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What Is Your Parenting Style, and Why Does It Matter?

From authoritarian to authoritative, permissive to neglectful, we're breaking down different types of parenting styles. Which one do you practice? 

Authoritarian Parenting

Permissive parenting, authoritative parenting, neglectful or uninvolved parenting, sub-types of parenting styles.

Your parenting style can affect everything from your child's self-esteem to their academic success. It's important to ensure your parenting style supports healthy growth and development because the way you interact with your child—and how you discipline them— will influence them for the rest of their life. 

Researchers have identified four main types of parenting styles that take a unique approach to raising children:

• Authoritarian
• Authoritative

People often want to know which parenting style they're using, and which one is the best overall. The truth is that there's no one right way to parent, but the general parenting style that most experts, including the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP), recommend is an authoritative approach.

Read on to learn the difference between these four major parenting styles (there are also newer parenting styles that have gained traction, including free-range and conscious parenting ), with information about popular subtypes like helicopter parenting, free-range parenting, tiger parenting, and more.

Baumrind's Four Parenting Styles

In the 1960s, developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind described three distinct parenting styles—authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive—based on parental demands and responsiveness to children. A fourth style, neglectful, was added later based on work by other researchers.

Do any of these statements sound like you?

• You believe kids should be seen and not heard.
• When it comes to rules, you believe it's "my way or the highway."
• You don't take your child's feelings into consideration.
• You've uttered the words "because I said so" when a child questions the reasons behind a rule.

If any of those ring true, you might be an authoritarian parent. The authoritarian style of parenting focuses on strict rules, obedience, and discipline. These parents have high expectations, and they don't hesitate to punish when children don't follow their guidelines.

Authoritarian parents take over the decision-making power, rarely giving children any input in the matter. Similar to an army drill sergeant, authoritarian parents are not nurturing, lenient, or communicable. They make the rules and enforce the consequences with little regard for a child's opinion.

How authoritarian parenting affects children

When raised by an authoritarian parent, children are often well-behaved at home, but they may rebel when with classmates or friends. Kids may also struggle with the following:

• Social skills
• Indecisiveness and trouble thinking on their own
• Low self-esteem
• Poor judge of character
• Anger management and resentfulness
• Hostility and aggression

Some research also indicates that children whose parents were authoritarian reported more substance use and higher instances of depression.

• You set rules but rarely enforce them.
• You don't give out consequences very often.
• You think your child will learn best with little interference from you.
• You let your children do what they want—even if it's drinking soda at every meal.

If those statements sound familiar, you might practice permissive parenting . Permissive parents are lenient, only stepping in when there's a serious problem. They're quite forgiving and they adopt an attitude of "kids will be kids." Oftentimes they act more like friends than authoritative figures.

Permissive parents cater to their children's needs without giving out much discipline . When they do use consequences, they may not stick. For example, they'll give privileges back if a child begs, or they may allow a child to get out of time-out early if they promise to be good. Permissive parents are the total opposite of strict.

How permissive parenting affects children

Since they have a high standing in the household, children of permissive parents are accustomed to getting whatever they want. They may exhibit more behavioral problems as they don't appreciate authority and rules.

Other downsides of the permissive parenting style can include:

• Lack of responsibility
• Difficulty with decision-making
• Impulsiveness and aggressiveness
• Lack of independence and personal responsibility
• Anxiety and depression
• Academic struggles

Kids who are parented permissively often act entitled, egocentric, and selfish. These children might also fail to put effort into school, work, or social endeavors since they don't have to put in any effort at home.

Additionally, kids raised by permissive parents are at a higher risk for health problems, like obesity , because permissive parents struggle to limit unhealthy food intake or promote regular exercise or healthy sleep habits. They're more likely to have dental cavities because permissive parents often don't enforce good habits, like ensuring a child brushes their teeth.

The "Gold Standard" Parenting Style

Experts consider authoritative parenting to be the most developmentally healthy and effective parenting style. Research has found kids who have authoritative parents are most likely to become confident, responsible adults who feel comfortable self-advocating and expressing their opinions and feelings.

• You put a lot of effort into creating and maintaining a positive relationship with your child.
• You explain the reasons behind your rules.
• You set limits, enforce rules, and give consequences, but also consider your child's feelings. 
• You use positive discipline strategies such as praise and rewards.

If those statements sound familiar, you might practice authoritative parenting , which is considered to be the "gold standard" parenting style. Authoritative parents provide their children with rules and boundaries, but they also give them the freedom to make decisions.

With an authoritative parenting style, parents validate their children's feelings while also making it clear that the adults are ultimately in charge. They invest time and energy into preventing behavior problems before they start. They also use positive discipline strategies , like praise and reward systems, to reinforce positive behavior.

Authoritative parents view mistakes as a learning experience, and they have clear expectations for their children. They're nurturing and warm, yet they instill the importance of responsibility and discipline.

How authoritative parenting affects children

Children raised with authoritative parenting tend to be happy, confident, and successful. They're also more likely to make sound decisions and evaluate safety risks on their own. Authoritative parenting is linked to academic achievement, heightened self-esteem, and resiliency.

Kids with authoritative parents tend to have the following positive outcomes:

• Close, nurturing relationships with parents
• Tendency to be responsible and respectful
• Ability to manage their aggression
• High degrees of self-esteem, self-confidence , and self-regulation
• More likely to be happy and successful
• Ability to clearly express their emotions

Kids who are parented authoritatively can be trusted to make the right decision on their own, and they often set high expectations for themselves. These children may also perform well academically and socially, and they're less likely to misuse drugs or alcohol.

Do any of these statements sound familiar?

• You don't ask your child about school or homework.
• You rarely know where your child is or who they're with.
• You don't spend much time with your child.
• You don't have many rules and expectations.

If those statements sound familiar, you might be an uninvolved or neglectful parent. Essentially, neglectful parents ignore their children, who receive little guidance, nurturing, and parental attention. They don't set rules or expectations, and they tend to have minimal knowledge about what their children are doing.

Uninvolved parents expect children to raise themselves. They don't devote much time or energy to meeting children's basic needs. At times, uninvolved parents lack knowledge about child development—or they may believe that their child will do better without their oversight.

Uninvolved parents may be neglectful but it's not always intentional. A parent with mental health issues or substance abuse problems, for example, may not be able to care for a child's physical or emotional needs consistently.

How uninvolved parenting affects children

Without any guidance, structure, or parental involvement, children of neglectful parents often act out. Research has found that kids with uninvolved parents have the worst outcomes, and they're more likely to experience the following:

• Substance use
• Rebelliousness
• Delinquency (vandalism, assault, rape, petty theft)
• Lower cognitive and emotional empathy
• Diminished self-esteem

Children of uninvolved parents might, for example, get in trouble at school or with the law. In addition, they might hesitate to form bonds with other people and exhibit depression. Academic performance and social competence often suffer.

Getty Images / Shaw Photography Co.

Of course, there are plenty of parenting style subtypes, including the following

Free-range parenting

Helicopter parenting, snowplow parenting, lighthouse parenting, attachment parenting, tiger parenting.

Free-range parents give their children the independence of being less supervised or unsupervised in public. For a long time, parents who practiced this style were considered neglectful, and many thought they endangered their kids.

But more recently (and after much debate) states like Utah passed laws in favor of the hands-off parenting style. Specifically, Utah changed the definition of neglect so it doesn't include certain independent childhood activities like walking to school and playing outside. Proponents say it can instill amazing qualities like self-sufficiency and resilience.

If you're an overprotective parent who feels the need to control most aspects of your child's life, you likely fit the bill of a helicopter parent . Helicopter parents constantly intervene in their kid's life, and they obsess about successes and failures.

The risk-assessing tendencies of helicopter parents are often driven by fear and anxiety. Parents who intervene in this way can hinder a child's ability to learn integral life skills, confidence, and self-sufficiency. Research by the American Psychological Association found that kids who experience helicopter parenting are less likely to be able to manage their emotions and behavior.

Snowplow parents (also known as lawnmower or bulldozer parents) are willing to drop everything to fulfill their child's wants and demands, no matter how small. They essentially "plow down" anything standing in their child's way.

These types of parents often have good intentions and don't want their children to experience struggle. However, their habits don't provide a foundation for long-term happiness, and they can worsen a child's anxiety about failure. An extreme example of snowplow parenting involves the college admissions scandal , where numerous high-profile celebrity parents were convicted of bribing colleges to admit their children.

One of the more balanced methods of parenting, the lighthouse approach was coined by pediatrician and author Kenneth Ginsburg, MD. In his book, Raising Kids to Thrive: Balancing Love With Expectations and Protection With Trust, Dr. Ginsburg writes: "We should be like lighthouses for our children. Stable beacons of light on the shoreline from which they can measure themselves against."

The lighthouse parenting style involves finding the perfect balance between loving, protecting, communicating, and nurturing your child. Parents seek to guide and support their children, much like a lighthouse does.

Attachment parenting involves a nurturing and hands-on approach. These parents think that putting a child's needs first leads to independence and emotional stability. Parents who follow this style value physical closeness, bed-sharing and co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding , positive discipline, and other attachment-based approaches to raising children.

A study by the American Academy of Pediatrics found an association between sensitive-responsive parenting and children’s language skills. Specifically, kids of parents with higher levels of responsiveness and warmth had more than two times better language skills than children whose parents were less responsive. On the other hand, this parenting style is demanding and can sometimes feel out of balance when parents are less flexible in their approach.

Often displaying rigid and harsh characteristics, tiger parents expect obedience and success. This term gained mainstream attention due to Amy Chua's book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom , where she describes tiger parenting as an authoritarian method commonly used in Chinese culture.

Some research has found a correlation between tiger parenting and anxiety in children , possibly due to their parent's high demands and constant expectations for perfection.

Additional reporting by Amy Morin, LCSW  

Parenting and Boundary Setting: Pediatric Mental Health Minute Series . American Academy of Pediatrics .

Parenting Styles: A Closer Look at a Well-Known Concept .  J Child Fam Stud. 2019.

Psychosocial consequences of parenting .  IOSR J Hum Soc Sci . 2016.

Types of Parenting Styles and Effects On Children .  StatPearls  [Internet]. Updated 2022.

Role of parenting styles in adolescent substance use: results from a Swedish longitudinal cohort study . BMJ Open.  2016.

Authoritarian parenting and youth depression: Results from a national study .  Journal of Prevention & Intervention in the Community.  2016.

Role of Parenting Style in Children’s Behavioral Problems through the Transition from Preschool to Elementary School According to Gender in Japan . Int. J. Environ. Res. Public Health . 2019.

Parenting Styles: A Closer Look at a Well-Known Concept .  J Child Fam Stud . 2019.

Consequences of parenting on adolescent outcomes .  Societies . 2014.

Psychosocial Consequences of Parenting . IOSR Journal Of Humanities And Social Science . 2016.

Helicopter Parenting May Negatively Affect Children’s Emotional Well-Being, Behavior . American Psychological Association . 2018.

Investigations of College Admissions and Testing Bribery Scheme . United States Attorney's Office . Updated 2023.

Parenting Behavior and Child Language: A Meta-analysis . American Academy of Pediatrics . 2019.

The moderating effects of positive psychological strengths on the relationship between tiger parenting and child anxiety . Children and Youth Services Review . 2018.

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Why Parenting Styles Matter When Raising Children

Verywell / Laura Porter

• Limitations

Parenting styles are constructs used to describe the different strategies parents tend to utilize when raising children. These styles encompass parents' behaviors and attitudes and the emotional environment in which they raise their children.

Developmental psychologists have long been interested in how parents affect child development . However, finding actual cause-and-effect links between specific actions of parents and the later behavior of children is very difficult.

Some children raised in dramatically different environments can grow up to have remarkably similar personalities. Conversely, children who share a home and are raised in the same environment can grow up to have very different personalities.

Despite these challenges, researchers have posited that there are links between parenting styles and the effects these styles have on children. And some suggest these effects carry over into adult behavior.

The Four Parenting Styles

In the 1960s, psychologist Diana Baumrind conducted a study on more than 100 preschool-age children. Using naturalistic observation , parental interviews, and other research methods , she identified important dimensions of parenting.

These dimensions include disciplinary strategies, warmth and nurturing, communication styles, and expectations of maturity and control. Based on these dimensions, Baumrind suggested that the majority of parents display one of three different parenting styles. Later research by Maccoby and Martin suggested adding a fourth parenting style. Each of these has different effects on children's behavior.

The four parenting styles identified by Baumrind and other researchers are:

• Authoritarian parenting style
• Authoritative parenting style
• Permissive parenting style
• Uninvolved parenting style

Authoritarian Parenting

In this style of parenting, children are expected to follow strict rules established by the parents. Failure to do so usually results in punishment. Authoritarian parents don't explain the reasoning behind these rules, either. If asked to explain, the parent might simply reply, "Because I said so."

Other common characteristics include:

• While these parents have high demands, they are not very responsive to their children.
• They expect their children to behave exceptionally and not make errors, yet they provide little direction about what they should do or avoid in the future.
• Mistakes are punished , often quite harshly, yet their children are often left wondering exactly what they did wrong.

Baumrind says these parents "are obedience- and status-oriented, and expect their orders to be obeyed without explanation." They are often described as domineering and dictatorial. Their approach is "spare the rod, spoil the child." They expect children to obey without question.

Effects of Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parenting styles generally lead to obedient and proficient children but can also lead to increased anxiety , lower self-reliance, and reduced intrinsic motivation . Children may also be more likely to lie to avoid punishment.

Authoritative Parenting

Like authoritarian parents, those with an authoritative parenting style establish rules and guidelines that their children are expected to follow. However, this parenting style is much more democratic.

Here are a few common characteristics of the authoritative parenting style:

• Authoritative parents are responsive to their children and willing to listen to questions.
• These parents expect a lot of their children but also provide warmth, feedback, and adequate support.
• When children fail to meet expectations , these parents are more nurturing and forgiving than punishing.

According to Baumrind, authoritative parents are good at setting standards and monitoring their children's behavior. Their disciplinary methods are assertive and supportive rather than intrusive, restrictive, or punitive.

For authoritative parents, the goal is to raise children who are socially responsible, cooperative, and self-regulated. The combination of expectation and support helps children of authoritative parents develop skills such as independence, self-control, and self-regulation. 

Effects of Authoritative Parenting

Authoritative parenting styles tend to result in happy, capable, and successful children. Studies also show that these children often have higher levels of life satisfaction when they get older.

Permissive Parenting

Permissive parents , sometimes referred to as indulgent parents, make very few demands of their children. These parents rarely discipline their children because they have relatively low expectations of maturity and self-control.​

Other common characteristics of permissive parenting are:

• Permissive parents prioritize being their child's friend rather than being a parent.
• They are warm and attentive but tend to set few rules, rarely enforce rules, and have few expectations.
• They allow their children to make their own decisions. 

According to Baumrind, permissive parents are responsive to their children but not demanding. Because they do not expect mature behavior from their children, kids may struggle to set limits for themselves.

Permissive parents are generally nurturing and communicative with their children, often taking on the status of a friend more than a parent. On the positive side, this can help kids become more self-sufficient and independent. On the downside, it can contribute to poor self-regulation .

Effects of Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting often results in children who rank low in happiness and self-regulation. These children are more likely to engage in high-risk behaviors and tend to perform poorly in school.

Uninvolved Parenting

In addition to the three major styles introduced by Baumrind, psychologists Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin proposed a fourth style: uninvolved or neglectful parenting. An uninvolved parenting style is characterized by few demands, low responsiveness, and very little communication.

Other characteristics of the uninvolved parenting style include:

• While these parents fulfill the child's basic needs, they are generally detached from their child's life.
• They might ensure that their kids are fed and have shelter but offer little to nothing in the way of guidance, structure, rules, or even support.
• These parents may seem indifferent, unresponsive, and dismissive.
• In some cases, these parents may reject or neglect the needs of their children. They may also be physically or emotionally abusive .

A 2019 study found that children raised by neglectful parents tend to struggle in school, experience more depression, have worse social relationships, have difficulty controlling their emotions, and experience more anxiety.

Effects of Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved parenting styles rank lowest across all life domains. These children tend to lack self-control , have higher rates of delinquency, and poorer self-reliance.

What's Your Parenting Style?

This fast and free parenting style quiz can help you analyze the methods you're using to parent your kids and whether or not it may be a good idea to learn some new parenting behaviors:

The Impact of Parenting Styles

Research suggests that parenting styles can have a range of effects on children. Some areas of a child's life that may be affected, whether in the present or the future, include:

• Academics : Parenting styles can play a part in academic achievement and motivation.
• Mental health : Parenting styles can also influence children's mental well-being . Kids raised by authoritarian, permissive, or uninvolved parents tend to experience more anxiety, depression, and other mental health problems.
• Self-esteem : Kids raised by parents with an authoritative style tend to have stronger self-esteem than kids raised by parents with other styles.
• Social relationships : Parenting styles can impact how kids relate to other people. For example, kids raised by permissive parents are more likely to be bullied, while kids raised by authoritarian parents are more likely to bully others .
• Adult relationships : Researchers have also found that kids raised by strict, authoritarian parents may be more likely to experience emotional abuse in adult romantic relationships .

Mixing Parenting Styles

The parenting styles of individual parents also combine to create a unique blend in each family. For example, the mother may display an authoritative style, while the father favors a more permissive approach. This can sometimes lead to mixed signals.

To create a cohesive approach to parenting, parents must learn to cooperate and combine their unique parenting styles.

Advantages of Authoritative Parenting

Because authoritative parents are more likely to be viewed as reasonable, fair, and just, their children are more likely to comply with their parents' requests. Also, because these parents provide rules as well as explanations for these rules, children are much more likely to internalize these lessons.

Rather than simply following the rules because they fear punishment (as they might with authoritarian parents), the children of authoritative parents are able to see why the rules exist, understand that they are fair and acceptable, and strive to follow these rules to meet their own internalized sense of what is right and wrong.

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Can You Change Your Parenting Style?

If you notice that you tend to be more authoritarian, permissive, or uninvolved, there are steps you can take to adopt a more authoritative parenting style. Strategies that may help include:

• Listen : Spend time listening to what your child has to say. Let them share their opinions, ideas, and worries with you. 
• Establish rules : Create a clear set of rules for your household and communicate your expectations to your child. In addition to telling your child what the rules are, explain why these rules exist.
• Consider your child's input : Authoritative parents set the rules but are also willing to listen to their child's feelings and consider them when making decisions.
• Be consistent : Enforce rules consistently, but be sure to provide consequences that are fair, proportionate, and educational. 

Developing a more authoritative parenting style takes time. With practice and consistent effort, however, you will find that your approach to parenting gradually shifts to a more supportive, involved approach that can lead to better developmental outcomes.

Limitations of Parenting Style Research

Links between parenting styles and behavior are based on correlational research , which is helpful for finding relationships between variables . However, such research cannot establish definitive cause-and-effect relationships.

While there is evidence that a particular parenting style is linked to a specific pattern of behavior, other variables, such as a child's temperament, can also play a significant role.

Children May Affect Their Parents' Styles

There is also evidence that a child's behavior can impact parenting styles. One study found that when a child misbehaves, a parent's response tends to be more variable. An interpretation of this result is that kids might misbehave not because their parents were too permissive but because parents of difficult or aggressive children gave up on trying to control their kids.

Outcomes Vary

The correlations between parenting styles and behaviors are sometimes weak, so the expected child outcomes do not materialize. For example, parents with authoritative styles may have children who are defiant or engage in delinquent behavior. Parents with permissive styles may also ave self-confident and academically successful children.

Cultural Factors Play a Role

Cultural factors also play a significant role in parenting styles and child outcomes. There isn't a universal style of parenting that is always best. For example, while authoritarian parenting is associated with poorer academic achievement, this effect is less pronounced in Hispanic families.

Final Thoughts

Parenting styles are associated with different child outcomes, and the authoritative style is generally linked to positive behaviors such as strong self-esteem and self-competence. However, other important factors—including culture, children's temperament , children's perceptions of parental treatment, and social influences—also play an important role in children's behavior.

Understanding more about your parenting style can help you explore different approaches to parenting your children. If you notice that you tend to have a more strict, indulgent, or dismissive approach, there are steps that you can take to become more involved and authoritative in how you relate to your children.

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By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

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Home / Parenting, Kids & Teens / The 4 types of parenting styles: What style is right for you?

The 4 types of parenting styles: What style is right for you?

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A parent’s job is to prepare their children to be adults who are capable of taking care of themselves and overcoming difficulties. It’s not an easy job. Parents have to set appropriate limits, watch their children fail and let them feel the consequences of their actions. Sometimes parents even endure the harsh screams of “I hate you!” or other painful words.

“I tell parents that it’s OK for your kids to be mad at you and not like you because of the limit you set,” said Hannah L. Mulholland, LICSW, MSW, a Mayo Clinic pediatric social worker. “You’re the best person in the world for them not to like and be mad at because you’re the one person who’s not going to desert them. You’re still going to love them, even when they’re mad at you. But for many parents, the reason they don’t set limits is because they want to be liked.”

Parenting is about supporting children while they make their own mistakes, take on age-appropriate responsibilities, think for themselves and solve their own problems. How you do that is up to you.

For example, you can let your kids choose how and when to do their homework — but also let them know that if they don’t do it, there may be consequences at school. “Let your kid be distressed. Let your kid make mistakes,” Mulholland says. “That’s how they learn.”

Kids who don’t learn might enter the adult world woefully unprepared or even afraid because they don’t know how to have relationships, do their laundry or manage their money. “They get in over their heads because they don’t really know what their own capacity is,” Mulholland says.

4 parenting styles

There are four main parenting styles: authoritarian, authoritative, permissive and neglectful. You don’t have to commit to one style. It’s natural to use different styles in different situations. When safety is at stake, a parent might use a firm authoritarian style that leaves no room for negotiation. But a parent might put consequences on hold and lean into a permissive approach to encourage a teenager to call for help if they put themselves in a dangerous situation.

“As parents, we are all doing the best we can each day,” Mulholland says. “Our intentions are always good, but we struggle to execute depending on our own capacity in the moment. Give yourself a break as a parent and recognize your own limits. All of the advice in this article is for when you are your very best self, not necessarily something you can implement all the time.”

Here’s a look at each of the four styles.

Authoritative parenting style

Authoritative parenting is often considered the ideal style for its combination of warmth and flexibility while still making it clear that the parents are in charge. (3) Children of authoritative parents know what is expected of them. Their parents explain reasons for the rules and consequences for breaking them. Parents also listen to their child’s opinions, but the parent remains the ultimate decision maker.

Authoritative parents develop close, nurturing relationships with their children. Children with authoritative parents tend to grow up confident, responsible and capable of managing their emotions. They are also friendly, curious and achievement-oriented.

What is an example of authoritative parenting style?

One place where parenting style shows is at mealtimes. Authoritative parents have more family meals where the parents model eating behaviors — rather than imposing strict restrictions. The parents will include the children in meal preparation. Perhaps the child will choose what’s for dinner one night a week or choose the side dish. Research shows that children of authoritative mothers have a high quality of diet and eat more fruit than children from different parenting styles.

Permissive parenting style

Permissive parents might pride themselves on being their child’s best friend. These parents are warm and nurturing with open communication. They are actively involved in their children’s emotional well-being. They also have low expectations and use discipline sparingly. Permissive parents let children make their own choices, but also bail them out if it doesn’t go well.

Children of permissive parents have the freedom to make decisions like what to eat, when to go to bed and whether to do their homework. These children tend to have good self-esteem and social skills. But they can be impulsive, demanding and lack the ability to self-regulate. (1) Permissive parents often try to control their child’s environment, so the child doesn’t have to experience rejection or failure. This means the child might enter adulthood unprepared.

What is an example of permissive parenting style?

When it comes to food, permissive parents might have lax rules. They allow the children to choose what they want, even if that means the parents make a special meal. This could lead to picky eating and unhealthy diet choices. Permissive parenting is associated with lower fruit and vegetable intake. It may also result in inexperience in trying new things or going with the flow and difficulty in social settings involving food.

Authoritarian parenting style

Authoritarian parenting uses strict rules, high standards and punishment to regulate the child’s behavior. Authoritarian parents have high expectations and are not flexible on them. The children might not even know a rule is in place until they’re punished for breaking it.

Children of authoritarian parents are good at following instructions and behave well. However, these children might grow up with a fear of punishment and lack experience making their own decisions. As a result, some might become aggressively rebellious, lack social skills and may have difficulty making sound decisions on their own.

What is an example of authoritarian parenting style? 

At mealtimes, authoritarian parents might enforce rules, such as the children eat the same meal as everyone else or finish everything on their plate. However, the family is unlikely to discuss why they eat certain foods and how they fit into their culture or affect a child’s health.

Neglectful parenting style

Neglectful parents fulfill the child’s basic needs, but then pay little attention to the child. These parents tend to offer minimal nurturing and have few expectations or limitations for their child. It’s not always a conscious choice parents make, but can be forced by circumstance, such as the need to work late shifts, single parenting, mental health concerns or overall family troubles.

Children of neglectful parents usually grow up to be resilient and self-sufficient out of necessity. They might have trouble controlling emotions, don’t develop effective coping strategies and they have difficulty maintaining social relationships. They tend to have low self-esteem and might seek out inappropriate role models.

What is an example of neglectful parenting style?

Parents who are uninvolved might not buy groceries or plan meals consistently. That could leave the child concerned about when they will next eat. It can lead them to become preoccupied with food. Children who had neglectful parents often overeat when food is available and may become overweight. But these children often have an easier time leaving home when it’s time.

How do I make sure I don’t mess up my child?

There’s no parenting style that is guaranteed to produce perfectly adjusted children. Nobody’s child is going to go through life universally liked and immune to failure or disappointment. Mulholland says everyone experiences difficulties. “It’s just unrealistic to say that a parenting decision is the reason for that.”

Since children will inevitably go through difficult moments, it’s best to equip them with the ability to bounce back. It helps if kids have had some practice from being allowed to try and fail in a safe environment.

For example, if a child played video games instead of studying, they might do poorly on the test. That’s how they learn that they need to manage their time better. But if you let them stay home “sick” to get an extra day to study, they won’t have learned a lesson.

A lot of parents see their child’s successes or failures as a reflection of themselves as a parent. But it’s the parent’s job to give the child the tools they need, not to control the situation.

“I’m always reminding parents that those aren’t your grades,” Mulholland says. “That’s not your college that they end up going to. That’s on them. You shouldn’t measure your worth as a parent on how successful your children are.”

How can parents change their parenting style?

If you find that your child is having some behavior issues, you might decide you need to adjust your parenting style. Behavior change can be as difficult for parents as it is for kids.

Mulholland recommends thinking back to your own childhood and what worked for you and what didn’t. Some people had parents who were very strict. The child wasn’t allowed to talk at the table and was punished severely. As a result, when they became a parent, they went the other way and became permissive. But perhaps a middle ground would work better. As you reflect on your own parenting, think about why you react the way you do.

If you want to change your parenting style, look into parenting workshops. Many schools or early childhood centers offer classes or can refer you to one. Mulholland also recommends the book, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk . A mental health therapist can also help you work through issues from your own childhood and find a parenting approach that will work for your family.

Which parenting style is most encouraged?

Authoritative parenting is the most recommended parenting style . The combination of clear communication and age-appropriate standards can lead to emotionally stable adults who can handle themselves in social situations and set goals for themselves.

To take an authoritative approach, parents can:

• Set clear boundaries and communicate them to children.
• Offer children choices and have discussions about what’s appropriate. For example, you can choose which pajamas you want to wear to bed. You cannot wear your winter coat to bed because it will be too warm.
• Listen to and explore their children’s emotional health concerns.
• Frequently express love and affection.

A helpful approach can be to use praise and positive reinforcement to encourage desired behavior. Ignore annoying, but not dangerous, attempts at getting attention, such as banging on a wall or whining. You also can tell children, “I’ll wait and respond to you when you stop whining.”

Another approach is to reward children with something they want. For example, instead of taking away their tablet until they do their homework, use it as a reward. “I’m going to give you your tablet as soon as you’re done with your homework.” That way the tablet is a reinforcer instead of a consequence.

How to set limits for children

A big part of parenting is setting rules and limits for your children. A metaphor from Russell A. Barkley, Ph.D. , suggests thinking of parenting like enclosing a pasture for your sheep. You build a fence and put things the sheep need in the pasture — plus some fun things to play with. Then let the sheep roam around within their limits.

“You don’t tell the sheep ‘You need to only be in this corner.’ Or ‘You need to only eat that type of flower,'” Mulholland explains. “They’re likely to run into the good flowers and eat the good stuff. But you’re also going to have the fence around them. So there’s a limit as to how far they can go.”

The same with children. As the parents, you set the limits and provide children with food to eat and toys to play with. As the children show they’re being responsible and can handle more, you can expand their boundaries.

Setting limits together

As much as you can, decide with your child what your limits are ahead of time. For example, before the start of a new school year, decide on your limits for weekday screen time, after-school snacks or homework rules.

If you’re trying to make rules on the fly, you’re more likely to be inconsistent from day to day. If you decide that the kids get 90 minutes of screen time on a school night, then you can always hold to that, and the kids know what to expect.

If you have a spouse or co-parent, discuss limits together. It’s common for two parents to have different ideas of what’s appropriate, so it’s helpful to set the boundaries together. And whether you live in the same house or not, try to maintain the same basic limits.

“The most important thing is — in front of the child — you 100% have your partner’s back, even if you disagree wholeheartedly with how they approached it. In front of the child, you have to have their back,” Mulholland says. “In the moment you say, ‘Yep. Dad said eat your broccoli. ‘” If you would have done things differently, talk to your partner about it away from the kids.

Your relationship with a grown child

Parenting style also plays a role in the relationship between parents and their children when they become adults. Kids who had strict, inflexible parents might not have a close relationship as adults. Kids of permissive parents might come back for help frequently when they are in a bind. Kids who grew up with encouraging, supportive parents tend to have close relationships with their parents. They will be independent, but still go to their parents for advice.

“The best-case scenario is they’re still keeping you involved in their life,” Mulholland says. “They’re telling you about the hardships and maybe even seeking advice, but they’re also not expecting you to fix everything.”

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4 Parenting Styles: How They Relate to a Child's Character

At every developmental level, authoritative parenting has the best outcomes..

Posted June 18, 2020 | Reviewed by Devon Frye

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In the early 1960s, when America was on the cusp of social upheaval that would challenge authority at all levels, a University of California, Berkeley psychologist named Diana Baumrind began a longitudinal study aimed at answering a timely question: How does our parenting —including our practice of authority as well as love—affect our children's development of character and competence?

More than 100 parents and their children participated in Baumrind's study. When the children were in preschool, middle school, and high school, the researchers spent 50 hours observing each family’s parent-child interactions at home and in the lab, and interviewed parents about those interactions.

In addition, researchers observed each child’s peer interactions at school. Finally, they interviewed every child individually when they were in middle school and again in high school.

On the basis of this research, Baumrind was able to identify four parenting styles. Each style was defined by how parents practiced “demandingness” and “responsiveness.”

Demandingness referred to the way parents used their authority —how they monitored their children’s activities, exercised control, and motivated compliance with expected behavior.

Responsiveness referred to the way parents expressed love —how they responded to their children’s needs and desires and how they helped their child meet parental expectations.

How Kids Turned Out

How did each of the 4 parenting styles integrate—or fail to integrate—demandingness and responsiveness, and how did kids raised with these different styles turn out?

1. Disengaged parents were neither demanding nor responsive.

Their attitude was basically one of not wanting to be bothered with the responsibilities of childrearing. Some were detached and neglectful; others were cold and rejecting.

Outcome: The children of disengaged parents had the worst outcomes. Most did not do well in school and had problems with peer relationships. By the time they were teens, they had the lowest achievement scores of all the youth in the study and the highest levels of anxiety , depression , and drug abuse .

2. Permissive parents were responsive, but undemanding.

These parents set few rules, frequently indulged their children, and tended to use manipulative methods like bribery or love withdrawal when they did try to motivate compliance. They did not require their children to be responsible or respect the needs of others. They avoided confrontations, preferring to be seen as friends rather than authority figures.

Outcome: The children of permissive parents were typically low in self-control , low in consideration of others, and low in achievement motivation . As teens, they were more likely to use drugs than children whose parents were higher in demandingness.

3. Authoritarian parents were demanding, but unresponsive.

They lacked warmth, were very critical, and rarely praised their children’s positive achievements or actions. They micromanaged their children’s activities and insisted on conformity to parental wishes in arbitrary and rigid ways that were unrelated to the child’s interests, abilities, or needs. They made no effort to communicate the reasons for their directives and demands but relied instead on threats and punishment to motivate compliance. Consequences for disobedience were harsh and sometimes unpredictable.

Outcome: Children raised in this manner saw their parents as arbitrary and unapproachable. These children lacked confidence and were prone to anxiety, depression, and giving in to peer pressure .

4. Authoritative parents were both demanding and responsive—high in their expectations and high in support.

They were warm and nurturing, encouraged individuality and age-appropriate independence, but also valued obedience to adult requirements. They knew where their children were and what they were doing. They praised positive behavior, gave rational explanations for their rules and expectations, and listened to their child’s perspective. They engaged in give-and-take but did not base their decisions solely on their child’s desires. Consequences for misbehavior were logically related to the child’s actions.

Outcome: Children with authoritative parents showed the highest levels of confidence, respect for others, self-control, and school achievement.

Confirmation From a 10-Year National Study of 20,000 Families

The superiority of authoritative parenting, with its balanced integration of demandingness and responsiveness, got major confirmation from a 10-year study led by Temple University psychologist Laurence Steinberg and focused just on the teenage years.

Whereas Baumrind study’s looked at 100 families, Steinberg’s investigated 20,000 families—drawn from nine diverse communities all across the United States.

To illustrate how the 4 parenting styles would play out in the teens, consider how each style would handle a common parent-teen scenario: Your teenager comes home late—after curfew.

• An authoritarian parent would impose a punishment with little or no discussion; the emphasis would be on following the rule, period.
• A permissive parent might be unhappy about the lateness but would avoid a confrontation about it.
• Disengaged parents probably wouldn’t have even set a curfew, or if they had, wouldn’t care much about the lateness.
• Authoritative parents would take the lateness seriously. They would find out why their child was late, discuss the legitimacy of the reason, and help their teen see why a responsible person, regardless of the reason, would phone (or text) to let their parents know they were safe but would be late.

The emphasis of the authoritative parent would be on the teen's taking the parent’s perspective and committing to more responsible behavior in the future. If the lateness problem recurred, there would be a discussion of fair consequences to motivate future compliance.

In Steinberg’s study, as in Baumrind’s, teens from authoritative families excelled in all categories. They were the most confident, the least likely to abuse drugs or alcohol , and the least likely to experience problems with anxiety or depression. They invested the most time in their studies and got the best grades.

The major takeaway from the Steinberg and Baumrind studies?

If you want to maximize your contribution to your child’s development of character and competence, integrate demandingness and responsiveness. This balanced, authoritative style of parenting combines:

• confident authority that sets high but age-appropriate expectations
• a high level of warmth and support that helps children meet those expectations
• rational explanations of parents’ rules and requirements
• valuing both obedience and age-appropriate independence
• fair and reasonable discipline that holds children accountable to expectations, with an emphasis on the development of responsibility
• parental willingness to engage in give-and-take that gives kids a fair hearing, with parents making the final decision
• treating children as individuals who have needs and feelings deserving respect.

In my next post, I'll describe 5 ways to practice authoritative parenting in the day-to-day flow of family life.

Baumrind, D. (2008). Authoritative parenting for character and competence. In D. Streight (Ed.), Parenting for Character: Five Experts, Five Practices . Portland, OR: The Center for Spiritual and Ethical Education.

Steinberg, L. et al. (1996). Beyond the classroom: Why school reform has failed and what parents need to do. New York: Simon and Schuster.

Thomas Lickona is a developmental psychologist, director of the Center for the 4th and 5th Rs, and the author of How to Raise Kind Kids (April 2018).

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The 4 Types of Parenting Styles & Their Effects on Children

Author: Ashley Stuck, LCSW

Ashley M. Stuck LCSW

Ashley offers over 10 years of expertise in addressing mental health challenges with compassion. Specializing in depression, anxiety, and addiction, she guides individuals towards wellness.

The four primary parenting styles in child psychology include authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and uninvolved. Each parenting style has its own unique characteristics, methods, and philosophy. Child development is affected by these parenting styles in various ways depending on parental child-rearing practices.

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What Are the Different Types of Parenting Styles?

The four primary parenting styles include authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved. Clinical psychologist Diana Baumrind coined the original three philosophies (authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive) before Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin later introduced the uninvolved approach. 1

Each parenting style differs in levels of demandingness and responsiveness. Many child psychologists consider authoritative parenting the ‘best’ practice because it balances parental support and warmth with appropriate discipline.

Baumrind’s parenting styles have been widely studied in psychology and are often used to understand the impact of parenting on child development. It is important to note that while these styles provide a framework for understanding parenting, there is no one “right” way to parent, and each family may have their own unique approach.

Parenting Practices Vs. Parenting Styles

Parenting styles refer to the overall approach and emotional climate that parents create in their interactions with their children. Parenting practices, also known as parenting methods, techniques, or child-rearing practices, involve the specific actions and behaviors that parents use to raise their children. Parenting styles provide a broad framework for understanding the parent-child relationship, whereas parenting practices are the distinct strategies used to implement that framework.

For example, a parent who believes in setting boundaries and fostering independence may adopt an authoritative parenting style by using practices such as allowing their child to make age-appropriate decisions under certain limitations. On the other hand, a parent who prioritizes warmth and nurturing may adopt a more permissive style, employing techniques like offering comfort and support without enforcing strict rules. Ultimately, the combination of parenting styles and practices shapes the overall environment a parent creates.

1. Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parenting styles include high parental demands for obedience, low warmth, and minimal affection for children. Authoritarian parents are strict and rigid, often using hostile control or punishment to maintain child compliance and obedience. Parents typically offer no explanation for rules or decisions and do not engage in discussion with the child. 2

Families practicing an authoritarian parenting style value a high adherence to obeying rules and behaviors at request. Authoritarian parents often struggle to see or are unwilling to provide explanations or rationale for their decisions, regardless if these relate to discipline, emotional well-being, or communication.

Authoritarian parents may have learned their style from previous generations or cultural experiences. These types of parents are commonly referred to as disciplinarians and may believe that children should be “seen, not heard.”

Characteristics of an authoritarian parenting style include:

• Low parental responsiveness
• Intense criticism of children
• Strict rules and expectations for obedience
• Little consideration for children’s feelings
• Lack of interest in child’s behavioral needs
• One-sided communication between parents and children
• Limited to no explanation is given to children for decisions, rules, or expectations
• Limited to no affection or importance placed on sharing emotions
• Strained and insecure parent-child relationship

2. Authoritative Parenting

An authoritative parenting style includes high parental demand coupled with responsiveness. In other words, a parent provides a nurturing and warm environment while setting firm limits and boundaries. 3 An authoritative parent-child relationship is democratic, and parents are willing to listen to their children’s viewpoints when explaining decisions.

Authoritative parenting styles encourage children’s independence. Parents understand and are sensitive to the fact that their children will have independent ideas and judgments. They are willing to listen to their children’s concerns and disagreements with an open mind. Unlike authoritarian parents, they provide reasoning and guidance for decisions and expectations.

Characteristics of an authoritative parenting style include:

• Provides consistent rules and expectations
• Emphasis on mental health and emotions
• Balances input and ideas from parent and child
• Creates an emotionally safe environment
• Parent-child relationship is healthy and supportive
• Modeling healthy boundaries and relationships for children
• Parental encouragement to be self-reliant
• Practicing flexibility
• Freedom for children to express and share feelings

3. Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting styles practice high parental responsiveness and low demandingness. While permissive parents are supportive and attuned to their child’s emotional needs, they struggle to set boundaries and expectations. They may also be considered lenient, passive, indulgent, or “lax” with rulemaking and can enable their children into adulthood .

A permissive parent typically places their child’s emotional needs and happiness above all else. As long as the child is happy, the parent is happy. Permissive behavior can look like struggling to say “no” when a child asks for or demands something to avoid disappointing them. Permissive parents do little to provide guidance on how to behave socially.

Characteristics of a permissive parenting style include:

• Social and emotional needs are valued
• Parent-child relationship is emotionally secure and safe
• Communication remains open
• Children are allowed to make their own decisions
• Expectations are rarely set or enforced

4. Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved parenting styles include both low demandingness and responsiveness. Indifferent, uninvolved parenting does not provide expectations or support regarding children’s behaviors, emotions, or needs.

Uninvolved parenting, sometimes referred to as neglectful parenting, provides basic needs for the child, such as shelter, clothing, and food. The parent does not set expectations for social or academic behaviors. A child’s emotions, relationships, and self-esteem are not supported or validated. Unlike other types of parents, uninvolved parents may be dismissive, uninterested in, or ignore the child outside of providing basic needs.

It is important to note that uninvolved parenting is not always done intentionally or with malicious intent. A parent may have to work long hours or multiple jobs to provide for the family or have uninvolved parents themself.

Characteristics of an uninvolved parenting style include:

• Does not address emotional needs
• Does not set behavioral or academic expectations
• Parent-child relationship is extremely fragile or non-existent
• Parents allow children to tend to themselves
• Little parental involvement in child’s activities
• Lack of nurturing and affection

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Examples of Parenting styles

Examples of parenting styles vary from family to family. For instance, authoritative parents may establish clear rules and expectations while offering support and warmth. On the other hand, authoritarian parents tend to enforce strict expectations and demand obedience, often using punishment as a means of control. These examples illustrate the diverse approaches parents can take in raising their children, with each style reflecting various parenting philosophies and priorities.

Below are examples of the four different parenting styles:

Examples of Authoritarian Parenting

Examples of authoritarian parenting can include common phrases such as “because I said so” or “what I say goes.” While these statements may be correct, they imply that acceptance and rule adherence should be automatic, even when confusing.

Further authoritarian parenting examples may include parental threats for poor childhood behavior. For instance, if a child asks for a toy at a store, the parent may say “no” without offering an explanation. The child reacts negatively, begins to complain, and raises their voice. The parent responds, “If you don’t stop, I will take all your toys when we get home.” This lack of parental understanding and empathy results in children automatically assuming that poor behavior will lead to dire consequences.

Examples of Authoritative Parenting

An example of authoritative parenting can include acknowledging emotions while correcting behavior. For instance, a child becomes angry at losing a game and breaks their controller. An authoritative parent would support and normalize the frustration instead of scolding the child. However, they would explain to their child that breaking valuables is not a healthy way to manage anger.

The parent might say, “I understand you are angry that you lost. It’s okay to be upset when we lose at a game. I would have been angry too. But, breaking our valuables when we are angry is not okay.” The parent might encourage the child to brainstorm how they might handle anger in a positive way, providing an opportunity for problem-solving and self-regulation.

Examples of Permissive Parenting

Permissive parents might say, “I never say no to my child,” or “My child chooses what they want to do.” Permissive parents struggle to set age-appropriate boundaries and instead shift decision-making to children. An example of permissive parenting may include allowing a child to make a choice that might negatively impact their well-being.

Imagine a child who wants to stay up later on a school night to finish watching a movie. A permissive parent will allow the child to stay up later, even though they must wake up and prepare for school in the morning. The permissive parent believes the child will make the “correct” decision for themselves and will learn from the experience. The permissive parent will be sympathetic to the fact the child is tired the next day but will not set a bedtime.

Examples of Uninvolved Parenting

An example of an uninvolved parent can include a parent returning home late from work and failing to make dinner for their child. The parent may tell the child “eat whatever” if they are hungry. The parent does not engage in conversation about the child’s day or assist the child in preparing a meal. The parent is too busy to check in with the child and believes they can manage their needs. However, a child may not have an understanding of what to prepare for a meal that is nutritious and filling.

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Effects of the Types of Parenting Styles

The four parenting styles can affect child development differently, shaping child behavior, emotional well-being, and social skills. Authoritative approaches are often associated with positive outcomes, such as increased self-esteem, better academic performance, and improved social skills. Conversely, the remaining parenting styles may contribute to long-lasting impacts, such as higher levels of anxiety, lower academic achievement, and increased risk-taking behaviors. Understanding the effects of parenting styles on child development can help parents make informed decisions about their approach to raising their children.

Effects of Authoritarian Parenting on Children

Because authoritarian parents place high demands on obedience and good behavior, they will expect kids to accept parental judgment and values. 4 This severely limits children’s ability to make judgments and decisions for themselves. Children of authoritarian parents tend to have poor mental health and emotionally withdraw from others due to a lack of encouragement to express and manage emotions. 5

Possible effects of an authoritarian parenting style on children include: 5,6

• Increased unhappiness
• Low independence
• Insecurities and low self-esteem
• Emotional dysregulation
• Poor coping skills
• Poor social skills
• Substance use
• Avoidant or disorganized attachment style
• Rebellious behavior and tendencies

Effects of Authoritative Parenting on Children

As noted, many consider authoritative parenting the optimal approach because parents create a warm and loving environment for their children. Children of authoritative parents tend to be more self-reliant and socially responsible because they have opportunities to explore autonomy and independence. 6

Possible effects of an authoritative parenting style on children include: 5,6

• Better mental health
• High self-esteem
• High academic achievement
• Positive social skills
• Healthy approach to relationships
• Secure attachment with parents

Effects of Permissive Parenting on Children

Permissive parents are warm and loving toward their children and their needs, which is healthy and can foster strong attachments and bonding. However, permissive parenting puts little emphasis on discipline and correcting behaviors. Approaching child rearing with indulgent behaviors can have implications. For instance, children of permissive parents tend to experience lower self-esteem and independence.

Possible effects of an authoritative parenting style on children include: 3,7

• Self-centered or egocentric behaviors
• Emotional and behavioral problems
• Low levels of self-reliance
• Low self-esteem
• Dependence on parents
• Impulsivity
• Rebellious behavior

Effects of Uninvolved Parenting on Children

Uninvolved parenting is arguably the most detrimental parenting to children. Uninvolved parents are unavailable, unresponsive, and reject children’s needs. Negligent parenting philosophies do not encourage setting rules, parental involvement, or showing affection which can have serious implications. 2

Possible effects of an uninvolved parenting style on children include: 2,3

• Poor mental health
• Low self-confidence
• Seeking validation from others

Other Parenting Styles

In addition to the four main parenting styles, parents can adopt several other unique approaches. Each combines various practices from the primary parenting styles to foster child development and growth. Again, there is no ‘right’ approach to parenting, so consider trying out a few techniques as you determine what is best for your family.

Below are some other parenting examples:

• Positive parenting: Positive parents promote good behaviors and choices using praise, encouragement, and rewards.
• Free-range parenting: Free-range parenting encourages independence and self-reliance, allowing children to explore and learn through experience with minimal supervision. While controversial, this approach can be beneficial when implemented correctly and safely.
• Attachment parenting: This parenting philosophy emphasizes the importance of the parent-child emotional bond. Attachment parents may use practices such as co-sleeping, babywearing, and responsive care.
• Gentle parenting: Gentle parenting , also known as soft parenting, prioritizes empathy, respect, and understanding in parent-child interactions. Parents provide guidance through supportive communication to address conflicts and challenges.

What Parenting Style Is Best for My Family?

Determining how to parent a child is a challenge for any family, and it takes time to find a parenting style that works well for their unique situation. Parents generally have a preferential style that traces back to their own experiences, observations, or information gathering. Parents often question and reflect on if their own style is optimal and struggle with determining the most effective way to discipline. 8

Because children do not come with instructions, parenting is a difficult job. If you recognize certain parenting practices or techniques you would like to change or more fully develop, there are certain factors to consider beforehand. Ultimately, you and your family can decide which parenting style fits your needs.

Below are things to consider when choosing a parenting style for your family:

• Your child’s temperament: Recognize your child’s unique personality and adapt your approach to best suit their needs. Understanding your child is essential when determining which parenting style works.
• Cultural environment and expectations: Be mindful of cultural norms and values that may influence your parenting choices and the expectations placed on your child.
• Your own availability: Consider the time and resources you can dedicate to parenting and choose a style that aligns with your capacity to provide consistent care and support.
• Your past experiences: Reflect on your own upbringing and the parenting styles you experienced. Use this insight to inform your approach.
• Your child’s limitations and individual needs: Tailor your parenting style to accommodate any special needs, challenges, or strengths your child may have.
• The size of your family: If you have more than one child, adjust your parenting approach to manage family dynamics and the needs of multiple children.
• The roles of other family members: Consider the involvement and influence of other caregivers, such as grandparents or siblings, in your child’s upbringing. If these figures play a significant role in their development, fill these individuals in on your parenting choices and practices.
• Child care: Inform any caregivers of the practices you have chosen for your family. Can they carry through with this style? Will they support your efforts? These are important questions to ask.

When to Seek Professional Help

If you struggle with choosing a parenting style, talking and working with a therapist or counselor specializing in family therapy and relationships can provide insight and strategies. They can assist you in practicing and implementing new parenting strategies into your family life. There are also numerous online therapy options if you have a busy schedule or prefer at-home sessions.

Participating in a psychoeducational group on parenting skills may also be beneficial, and several programs adapt to different needs and developmental ages. Additionally, certified parent coaching provides family support and helps cultivate a stronger parent-child bond.

Final Thoughts

Choosing the right parenting style depends on your availability, past experiences, and unique family needs. It’s important to remember that no single parenting style is perfect, and flexibility is key in adapting to the dynamics and challenges of your family. By understanding the different parenting styles, parents can make informed decisions that best support their children’s growth and well-being, fostering strong and nurturing relationships.

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Bi, X., et al. (2018). Parenting Styles and Parent–Adolescent Relationships: The Mediating Roles of Behavioral Autonomy and Parental Authority. Frontiers in Psychology , 9 . https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2018.02187

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Hosokawa, R., & Katsura, T. (2018). Role of Parenting Style in Children’s Behavioral Problems through the Transition from Preschool to Elementary School According to Gender in Japan. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health , 16(1), 21. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph16010021

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Parenting styles, authoritative.

In this parenting style, the parents are nurturing, responsive, and supportive, yet set firm limits for their children. They attempt to control children's behavior by explaining rules, discussing, and reasoning. They listen to a child's viewpoint but don't always accept it.

Children raised with this style tend to be friendly, energetic, cheerful, self-reliant, self-controlled, curious, cooperative and achievement-oriented.

In this parenting style, parents are warm, but lax. They fail to set firm limits, to monitor children's activities closely or to require appropriately mature behavior of their children.

Children raised with this parenting style tend to be impulsive, rebellious, aimless, domineering, aggressive and low in self-reliance, self-control and achievement.

Uninvolved 

In this parenting style, parents are unresponsive, unavailable and rejecting.

Children raised with this parenting style tend to have low self-esteem and little self-confidence and seek other, sometimes inappropriate, role models to substitute for the neglectful parent.

4 Types of Parenting Styles

Parenting styles are the practices, behaviors, and attitudes parents use when responding to or interacting with children. Parenting styles include how parents discipline, communicate, make decisions, and socialize children. The 4 types of parenting styles used in studies are authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved.

The first three parenting styles were identified by developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind at the University of California, Berkeley, in her 1967 study, “Child Care Practices Anteceding Three Patterns of Preschool Behavior.” The fourth parenting style, uninvolved or neglectful, was added by Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin at Stanford University in 1983. Maccoby and Martin also identified a conceptual structure combining different levels of demandingness and responsiveness to distinguish the 4 parenting styles in their 1983 book chapter “Socialization in the Context of the Family: Parent-Child Interaction” inside “Handbook of Child Psychology: Socialization, Personality and Social Development” (4th edition), edited by P.H. Mussen.

Baumrind is considered a pioneer of research into parenting styles. Her initial parenting typology and extensive parenting styles psychology studies laid the foundation for later research, according to a 2018 Belgium study, “Parenting Styles: A Closer Look at a Well-Known Concept,” conducted by Sofie Kuppens & Eva Ceulemans at KU Leuven and published in the Journal of Child and Family Studies. The 4 types of parenting styles classified by different levels of demandingness and responsiveness are commonly called the Baumrind parenting styles due to her contribution.

What is the Importance of understanding parenting styles for the development of children?  

Understanding parenting styles and their impacts on children is essential because how parents discipline and interact with children affects their development and outcomes, including self-esteem, health, risky behavior, school performance, and well-being. Numerous studies have found these findings, including a 2011 UK study, “Parenting Style and Youth Outcomes in the UK,” by Tak Wing Chan and Anita Koo at Oxford University, published in European Sociological Review.

Recognizing the different parenting styles allows parents to make informed decisions when raising a child and avoid ineffective parenting. The parenting style framework enables policymakers to predict child outcomes, design interventions, and allocate resources to help parents.

Table of Contents

1. Authoritative Parenting

Authoritative parenting uses high levels of control or demandingness. Authoritative parenting has high levels of warmth or responsiveness.

Authoritative parents have high expectations of their children’s maturity. Parents set clear boundaries and explain the reasons behind family rules. Authoritative parents use positive discipline to teach values and independence rather than to punish.

Authoritative parents are warm, nurturing, and supportive. Parents encourage open communication, listen to children’s perspectives, offer praise, and promote prosocial behavior.

The authoritative parenting style is considered the most effective parenting style by psychologists. The biggest advantage of authoritative parenting is that children have the best outcomes, including adjustment, performance, and mental health. The biggest disadvantage of authoritative parenting is that significant time and energy are needed for parents to be consistently responsive, set clear expectations, and engage in open communication.

The effects of authoritative parenting on children include better self-esteem, emotional regulation, academic success, social competence, and problem-solving.

The authoritative parenting style impacts children’s well-being positively due to how parents assert the power to control children’s behavior, according to Baumrind’s 2012 study “Differentiating between Confrontive and Coercive Kinds of Parental Power-Assertive Disciplinary Practices”, published in Human Development. Baumrind believed that authoritative parents’ confrontive power assertion behavior was associated with competence and mental health in children.

2. Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parenting uses high levels of control or demandingness. Authoritarian parenting involves low levels of warmth or responsiveness.

Authoritarian parents have high expectations of conformity. Parents are highly controlling and intolerant of misbehavior. Authoritarian parents expect children to comply with strict rules without questions. Parents ignore children’s feedback and rely on “because I said so” to substantiate rules. Authoritarian parents use harsh punishment to discipline when children do not meet the “absolute standard” of conduct set by the “authority figure.”

Authoritarian parents are cold and insensitive. Parents are not nurturing and unsupportive. Authoritarian parents tend to show little affection to their children. Parents often equate children’s fear of punishment with respect.

The biggest advantage of the authoritarian parenting style is that parents often achieve immediate behavioral control in their presence, creating the illusion that their children are always well-behaved. The biggest disadvantage of the authoritarian parenting style is that children often suffer mentally. Children with authoritarian parents tend to have lower self-esteem and life satisfaction and grow up with inferior outcomes, according to a 2007 study, “Maternal and Paternal Parenting Styles in Adolescents: Associations with Self-Esteem, Depression and Life-Satisfaction,” by Avidan Milevsky et al., published in the Journal of Child and Family Studies.

The effects of authoritarian parenting on children include low self-esteem, emotional regulation difficulty, behavioral issues, academic failure, and mental health issues.

Baumrind believed that verbal hostility and psychological control were among the most damaging aspects of authoritarian behaviors, leading to incompetence and maladjustment in adolescents, as detailed in her 2010 study, “Effects of Preschool Parents’ Power Assertive Patterns and Practices on Adolescent Development,” published in Science and Practice.

3. Permissive Parenting

Permissive parenting (indulgent parenting) involves low levels of control or demandingness and high levels of warmth or responsiveness.

Permissive parents have minimal expectations of children’s behavior and set few rules. Permissive parents are reluctant to punish when boundaries are crossed.

Indulgent parents are warm, open, and nurturing. Parents promote open communication and children are free to explore and express opinions.

The biggest advantage of the permissive parenting style is that children have high self-confidence, according to a 1991 study, “Patterns of competence and adjustment among adolescents from authoritative, authoritarian, indulgent, and neglectful families,” published in Child Development. The biggest disadvantage of permissive parenting is that children have lower self-control and are more prone to drug abuse.

The effects of permissive parenting on children include impulsivity, lack of self-discipline, poor decision-making, academic underachievement, and entitlement.

Baumrind’s research shows that permissive parents are low on behavioral control and household management, two kinds of demanding practices expected to have beneficial effects on children. Baumrind believes that unconstrained freedom of choice results in indeterminacy and groundlessness rather than empowerment and self-sufficiency. Adolescents from permissive families had significantly lower cognitive competence than those from either authoritative or democratic families, according to Baumrind’s 2010 study, “Effects of Preschool Parents’ Power Assertive Patterns and Practices on Adolescent Development,” published in Parenting: Science and Practice.

4. Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved parenting (neglectful parenting) involves low levels of control or demandingness and low levels of warmth or responsiveness.

Uninvolved parents minimaly involved in their children’s lives. Parents rarely communicate with children, and they provide little physical or emotional needs, guidance, or discipline. Children are expected to raise themselves.

Uninvolved parents are neglectful, cold, and uncaring, and they do not respond to their children’s needs.

The biggest advantage of uninvolved parenting is that it requires little effort and allows parents to focus on their own needs. The biggest disadvantage of uninvolved parenting is that children have the worst outcomes in self-regulation, achievement, and psychological well-being.

The effects of uninvolved parenting on children include low self-esteem, emotional detachment, difficulty with emotional regulation, poor social skills, and mental health disorders.

Baumrind believes that uninvolved parents are disengaged parents who are not committed. Baumrind expects children from uninvolved families to have the worst outcomes and lowest competence among the four parenting types.

What is a Parenting Style?

Parenting style is a consistent set of strategies for raising children. Parenting style defines a global climate in the home and influences children’s development and well-being. 

The styles of parenting are categorized differently by different researchers, often into three, four, or five types. The construct most often used in psychology research is the four parenting styles proposed by Diana Baumrind at the University of California, Berkeley, and refined by Eleanor Maccoby and John Martin at Stanford University. The 4 types of parenting styles are authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved.

What is Parenting?

Parenting is the process of raising and nurturing children from infancy to adulthood. Parenting involves providing emotional, social, and physical support to ensure a child’s well-being and development. Parenting activities include teaching, disciplining, and caring for children.

What are the Factors Affecting Parenting Styles?

The 8 key factors influencing parenting styles are family upbringing, parenting knowledge, cultural background, socio-economic status, personal characteristics, psychological factors, stress, goals, and expectations.

• Family Upbringing : The way a parent was brought up in their childhood affects their parenting styles, according to a 2015 study in Canada titled, “Parenting begets parenting: A neurobiological perspective on early adversity and the transmission of parenting styles across generations,” by Clyde Hertzman, Alison S. Fleming et al., published in Neuroscience. The study details how one generation’s parenting styles are neurobiologically transmitted to the next generation through life experiences. For example, a child raised by an authoritarian parenting style tends to become an authoritarian parent.
• Parenting Knowledge : When parents lack accurate information on child development, effective parenting, and family dynamics, they adopt familiar parenting styles. For most parents, this familiar style is the one they experienced during their upbringing. For example, parents raised by authoritarian parents may not realize that being firm and kind is possible. Their experience is limited to a firm and harsh parenting style, leaving them unaware of alternative approaches.
• Cultural Backgrounds : Parenting styles are influenced by cultural backgrounds that share specific values, beliefs, customs, and practices. For example, in collectivist cultures emphasizing obedience and conformity, parents tend to adopt a more authoritarian parenting style.
• Socio-economic Status (SES) : Socio-economic status varies in income, education, occupation, and social status. SES significantly affects parenting style by affecting family resources and opportunities. For example, limited resources in lower-income families experience more stress, resulting in more authoritarian or neglectful parenting styles.
• Personal Characteristics : Individual personality traits, behaviors, and temperaments define a parent’s characteristics. These characteristics influence the parent’s actions and decisions. For example, agreeable parents are more supportive. Agreeable parents tend to be authoritative, according to a 2010 research in the Netherlands titled “Personality and parenting style in parents of adolescents,” by Rutger CME Engels et al., published in the Journal of Adolescence.
• Psychological Factors : Parents and children’s mental and emotional states influence their interactions. For example, parents with low self-efficacy tend to give up easily when faced with parental difficulties and, therefore, adopt an authoritarian style to control using harsh discipline, according to a 2022 study in China titled “Impact of Parenting Style on Early Childhood Learning: Mediating Role of Parental Self-Efficacy” by Kong, Chuibin and Fakhra Yasmin, published in Frontiers in Psychology.
• Parenting Stress : Parental stress affects parenting style by impacting how parents interact with their children and manage daily challenges. Elevated stress levels lead to less patience, increased irritability, and inconsistent disciplinary practices. A stressed parent often reacts more harshly to minor misbehavior or struggles to provide the emotional support their child needs.
• Parental Goals and Expectations : Parental goals and expectations shape parents’ strategies and behaviors. For example, some parents with high academic expectations adopt a more authoritative or structured parenting style, emphasizing discipline and routine to ensure academic success.

What are the Impacts of Parenting Styles on Children?

Parenting styles significantly affect a child’s academic success, mental well-being, and self-esteem. Here are 8 key impacts of parenting styles on child development .

• Academics : Parenting style affects children’s school performance and overall learning through the level of support provided. For example, authoritative parents, who are supportive and set high expectations, tend to have children who achieve higher academically.
• Mental Health : Parenting style influences the mental well-being of children by creating an emotional climate at home. For example, nurturing authoritative parents raise kids with better mental health, while harsh authoritarian parents create a hostile environment, leading to anxiety in children.
• Self-Esteem : Parenting style shapes a child’s sense of self-worth and confidence through daily interactions. Warm and nurturing parents foster higher self-confidence in their children, whereas neglectful and uninvolved parents can cause children to feel unworthy of love, resulting in low self-esteem.
• Behavioral Outcomes : Parenting style affects children’s behavior through the standards set for conduct and the discipline and guidance provided. For example, permissive parenting may result in behavioral issues due to a lack of boundaries.
• Emotional Intelligence : Parenting style can influence a child’s ability to understand and manage emotions. For example, authoritative parenting enhances emotional intelligence by modeling and teaching empathy and emotional regulation.
• Parent-Child Relationships : Parenting style directly impacts the parent-child relationship. For example, authoritative parenting fosters strong, positive relationships through open communication and mutual respect, while authoritarian parenting can strain relationships due to fear and lack of trust.
• Social Skills : Different parenting styles affect children’s social skills by modeling human interactions and helping them develop emotional regulation. For example, permissive parenting may lead to difficulties in peer interactions due to a lack of discipline and regulation. In contrast, authoritative parenting promotes healthy social relationships by teaching social skills and empathy.
• Adult Relationships : Parenting style models interaction and communication with others, preparing children for adult relationships. For example, authoritarian parenting may result in difficulties due to poor conflict resolution skills, whereas adults raised by authoritative parents often form more stable and satisfying relationships.

Is the Authoritative Parenting Style Considered the Best Parenting Style in Child Psychology?

Yes, the authoritative parenting style is considered the best parenting style in child psychology. Authoritative parenting is consistently associated with the best outcomes in children’s outcomes, including social competence, academic achievement, mental health, physical health, behavior, and adjustment, according to a 2014 study, “Consequences of Parenting on Adolescent Outcomes,” conducted by Donna Hancock Hoskins of Bridgewater College and published in Societies.

What is the Unhealthiest Parenting Style for a Child?

The unhealthiest parenting style for a child is generally considered to be the uninvolved parenting style because it leaves the child without the basic necessities and emotional support they need to develop into healthy adults. Uninvolved or neglectful parenting style is linked most frequently to more serious delinquency trajectories in adolescent boys, according to a 2008 study, “Trajectories of Delinquency and Parenting Styles,” by Machteld Hoeve, Judith Semon Dubas, Rolf Loeber, et al., published in the Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology.

However, other studies have found that the authoritarian parenting style is just as detrimental as the uninvolved parenting style in some aspects. For example, both authoritarian parenting and uninvolved parenting are associated with the lowest levels of self-esteem and psychosocial maturity and the highest levels of emotional maladjustment, according to a 2019 study titled “Raising Children with Poor School Performance: Parenting Styles and Short- and Long-Term Consequences for Adolescent and Adult Development,” by Oscar F. Garcia and Emilia Serra of the University of Valencia, published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health.

Can Two Parents Have Different Parenting Styles?

Yes, it is common for two parents to have different parenting styles, according to a 2020 systematic review of 31 studies from more than 15 countries with a total 20,359 sample size. This study, titled “Systematic review of the differences between mothers and fathers in parenting styles and practices,” is conducted by Yosi Yaffe in the Faculty of Education, Ohalo Academic College, and published in Current Psychology. The findings reveal that the children perceive mothers to be more accepting, responsive, supportive, and more behaviorally controlling, demanding, and autonomy-granting than fathers. Mothers are more authoritative than fathers, and fathers are more authoritarian than mothers, according to parents and children in the studies.

Can a Parent Change their Parenting Style?

Yes, parents can change their parenting style over time. For instance, over half (53.6%) of adolescents experienced shifts in parenting styles in a 2014 Denmark study, “Parenting Style Transitions and Delinquency,” by Ryan D. Schroeder and Thomas J. Mowen, published in Youth & Society. The most common shift was from authoritative to permissive parenting. The shifts were likely driven by a combination of factors, including parents’ ongoing personal development, stressful life events (such as divorce or job loss), the child’s evolving behavior and needs, the inherently tumultuous nature of adolescence, and normal developmental processes as children age and require different levels of parental supervision and control.

Is Mixing Parenting Style a Good Idea?

Yes, mixing parenting styles is a good idea if at least one of the styles is the authoritative type. Multiple studies have shown that families with at least one authoritative parent have better outcomes than those without authoritative parents. Having two authoritative parents is optimal, while having two neglectful parents leads to the worst consequences, according to a 2011 study in the Netherlands titled “Maternal and Paternal Parenting Styles: Unique and Combined Links to Adolescent and Early Adult Delinquency” by Hoeve, Machteld, Judith Semon Dubas, et al., published in the Journal of Adolescence. Therefore, when one or both styles are authoritative, mixing parenting styles is beneficial.

Can Narcissistic Parenting Have a Negative Impact on Child Development?

Yes, narcissistic parenting can negatively impact child development. Children of narcissistic parents tend to suffer from developmental trauma in adulthood, according to a 2016 study, “Narcissism, Parenting, Complex Trauma: The Emotional Consequences Created for Children by Narcissistic Parents,” conducted by Donna M. Mahoney at the Illinois School of Professional Psychology/Schaumburg, and published in The Practitioner Scholar: Journal of the International Trauma Training Institute.

Narcissistic people are characterized by grandiosity, self-centeredness, and a lack of empathy, resulting in troubled interpersonal relationships with partners and children. Narcissistic parents tend to adopt a non-authoritative parenting style, according to a 2017 UK study, “The children of narcissus: Insights into narcissists’ parenting styles.” by Hart, Claire M. et al. of the University of Southampton and the University of Surrey, published in Personality and Individual Differences. The study has found that narcissists’ low empathy predicts unresponsive caregiving towards children, resulting in a non-optimal (authoritative) parenting style.

What are other Factors that Affect Child Growth and Development?

Genetics, attachment styles, and family dynamics are other factors that affect child growth and development besides parenting style. Here are seven other factors that affect children’s growth and development.

• Genetics : Genetics influence a child’s physical attributes, susceptibility to certain diseases, and potential for cognitive abilities. Genetics also affect a child’s temperament and interactions with the environment.
• Attachment Style : A secure attachment fosters emotional stability and confidence, while an insecure attachment can lead to emotional and social difficulties.
• Family Dynamics : Positive family dynamics provide emotional support and stability, whereas negative dynamics can lead to stress and behavioral issues.
• Nutrition : Proper nutrition is crucial for physical growth, brain development, and overall health; malnutrition can lead to developmental delays and health problems.
• Socioeconomic status (SES) : Higher SES often provides better access to education, healthcare, and enrichment activities, whereas lower SES can limit these opportunities and increase stress.
• Environment : A stimulating and safe environment encourages exploration and learning, while a deprived or unsafe environment can hinder development.
• Culture : Cultural values and practices shape social behaviors, learning styles, and developmental expectations, influencing a child’s growth and development trajectory.

How Does Parenting Style Influence Attachment Style in Children?

Parenting style influences children’s attachment styles by shaping their perceptions of themselves, the world, and their relationships. Through parenting practices and interactions, children form attachment styles that reflect their self-worth. Responsive parenting causes secure attachment, while unresponsive parenting leads to insecure attachment, according to a 2006 study, “Responsive Parenting: Establishing Early Foundations for Social, Communication, and Independent Problem-Solving Skills,” by Susan H. Landry et al., published in Developmental Psychology.

Authoritative and permissive parents are responsive, warm, and nurturing. Therefore, authoritative and permissive parenting styles tend to result in secure attachment styles in children. Authoritarian and uninvolved parents are unresponsive, cold, and distant. Therefore, authoritarian and uninvolved parenting styles likely result in insecure attachment styles, such as ambivalent, avoidant, and disorganized attachment styles.

Disclaimer: The content of this article is intended for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider for medical concerns.

4 Main Types of Parenting Styles and How They Impact Kids

Aubrey Freitas is a former Registered Behavioral Therapist (RBT) who has two Bachelor of Arts degrees from UCLA in Psychology and English. She is a Certified Resilience Peer through her work with the Depression Grand Challenge, and a lifelong mental health advocate.

Learn about our Editorial Policy .

Parenting and its effects on children have been studied widely and research has broken the subject down into four main categories classified as parenting styles. These styles of parenting have both similarities and differences between them, ranging from creating many boundaries for children to not having any boundaries at all. There are pros and cons to virtually every parenting style, and incorporating the positive aspects of them into your life can have a positive impact on your children and family dynamic.

Permissive Parenting

According to the American Psychological Association (APA), permissive parenting is defined as a parenting style "in which the child is given wide latitude in expressing his or her feelings and opinions and in which artificial restrictions and punishment are avoided as much as possible." Permissive parents are warm towards their children but do not establish rules or boundaries for them to follow. It involves three mains aspects :

• High amounts of support and emotional availability
• Low amounts of psychological control
• Low amounts of behavioral control

Effects of Permissive Parenting

Although permissive parents offer emotional support for children, that does not necessarily mean that the parent-child relationship is healthy, which has led to research finding negative outcomes in children. Some effects of permissive parenting on children include:

• Increased rates of impulsion
• Higher rates of rebellion
• Decreased rates of self-reliance and self-control
• Lower rates of academic achievement
• Increased rates of aggression

Permissive Parenting Examples

Permissive parents provide love and support for their child but don't set up boundaries for them to abide by. Without any strict rules or guidance, this means that children can engage in any kind of behavior they choose, without any consequences in the parent-child relationship. Some examples of this are:

• Giving children whatever they want in order to make them happy.
• Not setting up basic safety rules for children to follow.
• Putting a child's wants before your own needs.
• Not being able to say 'no' to their children.

Authoritarian Parenting

Unlike with permissive parenting, authoritarian parenting involves setting strict rules for children. The APA describes it as a parenting style "in which the parent or caregiver stresses obedience, deemphasizes collaboration and dialogue, and employs strong forms of punishment." Its parenting dimensions include:

• Low amounts of support and emotional availability
• High amounts of psychological control
• High amounts of behavioral control

There are different types of authoritarian parenting that keep high expectations and behavioral control of children consistent. Some of these terms are commonly used and include:

• Helicopter parenting - parenting in which a parent "hovers" around their children, stepping in whenever the child expereiences difficulty
• Snowplow parenting - parenting in which a child's success must be achieved at all costs
• Lawnmower parenting - parenting in which a parent constantly intervenes in their child's life

Effects of Authoritarian Parenting

The authoritarian parenting style has also been found to lead to negative outcomes in children. Some of these effects include:

• Higher rates of deviant behavior and misconduct
• Increased rates of depression and anxiety
• Antisocial behavior
• Higher rates of depersonalization

Examples of Authoritarian Parenting

Just like with other parenting styles, strict authoritarian parents want their children to succeed; however, their way of ensuring that is by taking as much control over the child as possible to guide them to success seamlessly. Some examples of authoritarian parenting include:

• Forcing a child to follow a pre-set 'plan' or 'goal' that the parent has established for them
• Not allowing a child to pursue their own interests, extracurricular activities, or friends because the parents believe they know what is best for the child in order to help them succeed
• Engaging in strict punishments for a child whenever they go against something a parent said or question it
• Setting many harsh rules for a child to follow that aren't set in place specifically for the child's safety but because the parent wants more control

Neglectful Parenting

According to the APA, neglectful parenting is when "the parent or caregiver is unsupportive, fails to monitor or limit behavior, and is more attentive to his or her needs than those of the child." Neglectful parents are very hands-off, even more so than permissive parenting. In this parenting style, children are given neither emotional nor rules to follow. It involves:

• Low psychological control
• Low behavioral control

Effects of Neglectful Parenting

Research has found that neglectful parenting is associated with the most negative outcomes for kids. It leaves children feeling unsupported, unmotivated, and unprotected, which makes it difficult for them to thrive in such a scarcity mindset. Some negative effects on kids include:

• Decreased rates of self-regulation
• Lower rates of social responsibility
• Decreased rates of social competence
• Lower rates of academic performance

Examples of Neglectful Parenting

After learning more about the neglectful parenting style, you may be wondering what this looks like in practice. Some examples of this parenting style are:

• Not taking an interest in your child's extracurricular activities
• Allowing your child to engage in risky/dangerous behavior so that you don't have to get involved
• Not comforting your child when they are upset or hurt
• Not engaging in open communication with your child to learn more about them or their needs

Authoritative Parenting

Authoritative parenting is a style of parenting "in which the parent or caregiver encourages a child's autonomy yet still places certain limitations on behavior." Authoritative parents find a balance between embracing their children with warmth and setting boundaries for them in order to keep them safe. It is composed of:

• High behavioral control

Although authoritative parenting is the term used in psychology to describe parents that balance both love and rule-setting, there are other terms for this style of parenting that have become popular in everyday use. These different parenting styles may vary slightly, but keep the core elements of authoritative parenting consistent. Some of these include:

• Gentle parenting - parenting centered around empathy, respect, and boundaries
• Lighthouse parenting - parenting style that balances love and boundaries
• Free-range parenting - parenting style in which parents support children as they make their own life choices

Effects of Authoritative Parenting

Research shows that the authoritative parenting style is associated with the most positive outcomes for children. Some positive effects on kids include:

• Decreased rates of substance abuse
• Lower rates of deviance and delinquency
• Decreased rates of depression
• Higher rates of self-esteem and optimism
• Increased rates of academic achievement

Examples of Authoritative Parenting

Practicing authoritative parenting may look slightly different from household to household based on your family's specific rules and boundaries. That being said, there should be consistencies surrounding love, rules, and mutual understanding. Some examples of authoritative parenting include:

• Explaining to your child why you have established a specific rule/boundary
• Allowing your child to give their opinion about the rule and possibly being flexible about it
• Encouraging your child to pursue their own unique interests
• Practicing open communication throughout your family so that everyone feels heard and understood

Understanding Your Parenting Style

The four main parenting styles share some similarities between them, but the differences surrounding emotional support for children and rates of behavioral and psychological control establish firm separations. Authoritative parenting has been found to lead to the most positive outcomes for a child's development and well-being. So, by adopting some of its cornerstones into your lifestyle, such as open communication, it may help benefit your family and parent-child relationships. There is no such thing as a perfect parent, so don't pressure yourself to try to become one. Sharing your needs, boundaries, and love with your family is a great next step to take in the marathon that is parenting.

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Parenting Styles: A Closer Look at a Well-Known Concept

Sofie kuppens.

1 Erasmus School of Health Policy & Management, Erasmus University Rotterdam, Rotterdam, The Netherlands

2 Department of Public Health and Primary Care, KU Leuven, Leuven, Belgium

Eva Ceulemans

3 Faculty of Psychology and Educational Sciences, KU Leuven, Leuven, Belgium

Although parenting styles constitute a well-known concept in parenting research, two issues have largely been overlooked in existing studies. In particular, the psychological control dimension has rarely been explicitly modelled and there is limited insight into joint parenting styles that simultaneously characterize maternal and paternal practices and their impact on child development. Using data from a sample of 600 Flemish families raising an 8-to-10 year old child, we identified naturally occurring joint parenting styles. A cluster analysis based on two parenting dimensions (parental support and behavioral control) revealed four congruent parenting styles: an authoritative, positive authoritative, authoritarian and uninvolved parenting style. A subsequent cluster analysis comprising three parenting dimensions (parental support, behavioral and psychological control) yielded similar cluster profiles for the congruent (positive) authoritative and authoritarian parenting styles, while the fourth parenting style was relabeled as a congruent intrusive parenting style. ANOVAs demonstrated that having (positive) authoritative parents associated with the most favorable outcomes, while having authoritarian parents coincided with the least favorable outcomes. Although less pronounced than for the authoritarian style, having intrusive parents also associated with poorer child outcomes. Results demonstrated that accounting for parental psychological control did not yield additional parenting styles, but enhanced our understanding of the pattern among the three parenting dimensions within each parenting style and their association with child outcomes. More similarities than dissimilarities in the parenting of both parents emerged, although adding psychological control slightly enlarged the differences between the scores of mothers and fathers.

Parenting has gained ample research attention from various scientific disciplines. Many theoretical frameworks emphasize that parenting plays a vital role in child development, which has fueled research investigating the impact of parenting on child development for over 75 years. When studying parenting, researchers can take various strategies by considering parenting practices, parenting dimensions or parenting styles. Parenting practices can be defined as directly observable specific behaviors that parents use to socialize their children (Darling and Steinberg 1993 ). For example, parenting practices intended to promote academic achievement are showing involvement by attending parent–teacher meetings or regular supervision of children’s homework. Other parenting practices pertain to positive reinforcement, discipline, or problem solving.

Rather than focusing on specific parenting practices, other researchers have identified overarching parenting dimensions that reflect similar parenting practices, mostly by modeling the relationships among these parenting practices using factor analytic techniques. There is consensus among scientists about the existence of at least two broad dimensions of parenting, labeled parental support and parental control. Parental support pertains to the affective nature of the parent-child relationship, indicated by showing involvement, acceptance, emotional availability, warmth, and responsivity (Cummings et al. 2000 ). Support has been related to positive development outcomes in children, such as the prevention of alcohol abuse and deviance (Barnes and Farrell 1992 ), depression and delinquency (Bean et al. 2006 ) and externalizing problem behavior (Shaw et al. 1994 ).

The control dimension has been subdivided into psychological and behavioral control (Barber 1996 ; Schaefer 1965 ; Steinberg 1990 ). Parental behavioral control consists of parenting behavior that attempts to control, manage or regulate child behavior, either through enforcing demands and rules, disciplinary strategies, control of rewards and punishment, or through supervisory functions (Barber 2002 ; Maccoby 1990 ; Steinberg 1990 ). An appropriate amount of behavioral control has been considered to positively affect child development, whereas insufficient (e.g., poor parental monitoring) or excessive behavioral control (e.g., parental physical punishment) has been commonly associated with negative child developmental outcomes, such as deviant behavior, misconduct, depression and anxious affect (e.g., Barnes and Farrell 1992 ; Coie and Dodge 1998 ; Galambos et al. 2003 ; Patterson et al. 1984 ). While parental behavioral control refers to control over the child’s behavior, parental psychological control pertains to an intrusive type of control in which parents attempt to manipulate children’s thoughts, emotions, and feelings (Barber 1996 ; Barber et al. 2005 ). Due to its manipulative and intrusive nature, psychological control has almost exclusively been associated with negative developmental outcomes in children and adolescents, such as depression, antisocial behaviour and relational regression (e.g., Barber and Harmon 2002 ; Barber et al. 2005 ; Kuppens et al. 2013 ). The three parenting dimensions (support, psychological control, and behavioral control) have been labelled conceptually distinct, although they are related to some extent (Barber et al. 2005 ; Soenens et al. 2012 ).

Other authors have taken yet a different approach to studying parenting by emphasizing that specific combinations of parenting practices within a parent particularly impact child development rather than separate parenting practices or dimensions (e.g., Baumrind 1991 ; Maccoby and Martin 1983 ). Within such a configurational approach, one examines which patterns of parenting practices occur within the same parent and how these patterns—commonly labelled as parenting styles— are related to children’s development. Such parenting styles have the clear advantage of accounting for different parenting practices at the same time within the same person. As such, it comprises a person–centered approach that focuses on configurations within individuals rather than a variable–centered approach that focuses on relationships among variables across individuals as has been used to identify parenting dimensions (Magnusson 1998 ).

Baumrind ( 1966 , 1967 , 1971 ) is commonly considered a pioneer of research into parenting styles. She introduced a typology with three parenting styles to describe differences in normal parenting behaviors: the authoritarian, authoritative and permissive parenting style. Baumrind ( 1971 ) suggested that authoritarian parents try to shape, control, and evaluate their children’s behavior based on the absolute set of standards; whereas permissive parents are warmer and more autonomy granting than controlling. She considered an authoritative parenting style to fall between those two extremes. Later on in the 1980s, Maccoby and Martin ( 1983 ) attempted to bridge Baumrind’s typology and parenting dimensions. Based on the combination of two dimensions – demandingness and responsiveness – they defined four parenting styles: authoritative (i.e., high demandingness and high responsiveness); authoritarian (i.e., high demandingness and low responsiveness); indulgent (i.e., low demandingness and high responsiveness); and neglectful (i.e., low demandingness and low responsiveness). These two parenting dimensions are similar, yet not identical to the dimensions ‘parental support’ and ‘parental behavioral control’. Based on Maccoby and Martin’s work, Baumrind ( 1989 , 1991 ) expanded her typology with a fourth parenting style, namely the ‘neglectful’ parenting style.

Maccoby and Martin ( 1983 ) research efforts primarily focused on the configuration of the parenting styles and to a lesser extent on their association with children’s development. Baumrind, in contrast, has also extensively studied the association between parenting styles and child development (1967, 1971, 1989, 1991). This work consistently demonstrated that youth of authoritative parents had the most favorable development outcomes; authoritarian and permissive parenting were associated with negative developmental outcomes; while outcomes for children of neglectful parents were poorest. These aforementioned associations have also been replicated by other researchers. An authoritative parenting style has consistently been associated with positive developmental outcomes in youth, such as psychosocial competence (e.g., maturation, resilience, optimism, self-reliance, social competence, self-esteem) and academic achievement (e.g., Baumrind 1991 ; Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ). Findings regarding permissive/indulgent parenting have been inconsistent yielding associations with internalizing (i.e., anxiety, depression, withdrawn behavior, somatic complaints) and externalizing problem behavior (i.e., school misconduct, delinquency), but also with social skills, self–confidence, self–understanding and active problem coping (e.g., Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ; Williams et al. 2009 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ). An authoritarian parenting style has consistently been associated with negative developmental outcomes, such as aggression, delinquent behaviors, somatic complaints, depersonalisation and anxiety (e.g., Hoeve et al. 2008 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ; Williams et al. 2009 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ). Children of neglectful parents have shown the least favorable outcomes on multiple domains, such as lacking self-regulation and social responsibility, poor self-reliance and social competence, poor school competence, antisocial behavior and delinquency, anxiety, depression and somatic complaints (e.g., Baumrind 1991 ; Hoeve et al. 2008 ; Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ).

Baumrind’s typology (1966) was initially determined on theoretical grounds, although with time she did conduct empirical validation research (1967, 1971, 1989, 1991). Nonetheless, the empirical studies always started with parenting styles that were predefined in a prototypical score profile in terms of minimum or maximum limit scores (e.g., scores above or below the median) on the different parenting practices; thus parents were first classified using cut–off scores for these predefined parenting styles and afterwards associations with child developmental outcomes were examined. However, such a confirmatory approach is not preferred to investigate parenting styles types (Mandara 2003 ) as it does not allow the identification of the naturally occurring typology, because people are actually forced into some predefined category defined on theoretical grounds. To empirically identify typologies in a certain population an exploratory clustering approach is needed (Everitt et al. 2001 ; Mandara 2003 ). Such clustering methods entail that persons are assessed on different variables (e.g., parenting practices) and patterns that naturally occur in the data are identified. Persons with a similar score profile are classified in the same cluster and those with distinctly different profile scores are classified into other clusters; with the number of clusters and associated score profiles being unknown a priori. The literature shows that researchers started to adopt such clustering methods in research into parenting styles about 15 to 20 years ago (Aunola et al. 2000 ; Beato et al. 2016 ; Brenner andand Fox 1999 ; Carlson and Tanner 2006 ; Chaudhuri et al. 2009 ; Dwairy et al. 2006 ; Gorman-Smith et al. 2000 ; Heberle et al. 2015 ; Hoeve et al. 2008 ; Lee et al. 2006 ; Mandara and Murray 2002 ; Martin et al. 2007 ; McGroder 2000 ; McKinney and Renk 2008 ; Meteyer and Perry-Jenkins 2009 ; Metsäpelto and Pulkkinen 2003 ; Pereira et al. 2008 ; Russell et al. 1998 ; Shucksmith et al. 1995 ; Tam and Lam 2004 ; van der Horst and Sleddens 2017 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ). These studies have generally identified three or four parenting styles that resemble the initial theoretical parenting styles.

Although Baumrind’s typology has greatly influenced parenting research, two issues have largely been overlooked in the existing knowledge. A first issue relates to the psychological control dimension which is currently considered the third parenting dimension. Initially, Baumrind paid little attention to the role of psychological control because her control dimension solely referred to parental socializing practices aimed at integrating the child in the family and society (Darling and Steinberg 1993 ). In her later work (1971, 1989, 1991), Baumrind did incorporate aspects of psychological control but the confirmatory nature of that research (cf. using predefined clusters) makes it impossible to determine which parenting styles would naturally evolve when psychological control would be taken into account. Empirical studies have also rarely explicitly included parental psychological control when modeling parenting styles. So far, the limited research including psychological control indices (e.g., Pereira et al. 2008 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ) has mostly identified four parenting styles that match the theoretically distinct styles. Within these parenting styles psychological control coincided with behavioral control levels in the authoritarian parenting style, yet cumulative knowledge remains too limited to draw firm conclusions.

A second issue is that existing research provides little insight into the coexistence of maternal and paternal parenting styles and their joint impact on child development. Although Baumrind included both parents in her studies, she assigned a (pre-defined) parenting style to each one separately. In some studies (1991), data was limited to mothers if both parents were assigned a different parenting style; in others (1971) families were entirely excluded in such instances. Not only Baumrind, but research on parenting styles in general has paid less attention to the impact of joint parenting styles on child development (Martin et al. 2007 ; McKinney and Renk 2008 ; Simons and Conger 2007 ), but has mainly focused on the unique, differential or interaction effects of maternal and paternal parenting styles adopting a variable-oriented perspective (e.g., Beato et al. 2016 ; Miranda et al. 2016 ). Children in two-parent households are influenced by the combined practices of both parents (Martin et al. 2007 ); and some studies have clearly shown that mothers and fathers can differ in their parenting style (Conrade and Ho 2001 ; McKinney and Renk 2008 ; Russell et al. 1998 ). Considering how the parenting styles of both parents cluster together, therefore, aligns more closely with the real experiences of children growing up in two-parent households. Only such an approach can shed light onto possible additive and compensatory effects (Martin et al. 2007 ). For example, Simons and Conger ( 2007 ) found evidence for an additive effect as having two authoritative parents was associated with the most favorable outcomes in adolescents, as well as a compensatory effect where one parent’s authoritative parenting style generally buffered the less effective parenting style of the other parent. Similarly, McKinney and Renk ( 2008 ) suggested that in late adolescence perceiving one parent as authoritative while the other parent has a different parenting style, partly buffered for emotional adjustment problems.

Only two studies have simultaneously clustered maternal and paternal practices into joint parenting styles and examined how they are associated with child development (for other approaches, see Martin et al. 2007 ; Simons and Conger 2007 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ). Meteyer and Perry-Jenkins ( 2009 ) modeled the warmth and dysfunctional discipline practices of both parents resulting in three parenting styles that aligned with Baumrind’s typology, namely supportive parents (i.e., similar to Baumrind’s authoritative style), mixed–supportive parents (i.e., mother’s parenting style is similar to Baumrind’s ‘good enough parenting’–style and father’s to Baumrind’s authoritarian style) and non–supportive parents (i.e., similar to Baumrinds’ authoritarian style). Although insightful, this study did not incorporate aspects of psychological control; was limited to early elementary school children (6– to 7– year olds); and was based on a rather small sample size (85 families). McKinney and Renk ( 2008 ) identified four joint parenting styles in their cluster analyses using late adolescents’ (18–22 years) reports of authoritative, authoritarian, and permissive parenting: congruent authoritative (i.e., an authoritative parenting style by both parents), congruent authoritarian (i.e., an authoritarian parenting style by both parents), an authoritarian father–authoritative mother combination, and a permissive father–authoritarian mother combination. This study used ratings of parenting styles as input for cluster analysis leaving the role of separate parenting dimensions unclear.

We aimed to extend the existing research on the well-known parenting styles concept by identifying joint parenting styles in an exploratory manner using data on three major parenting dimensions (i.e., support, behavioral control and psychological control) and their associations with child behavioral outcomes in a large sample of mothers and fathers raising elementary school children. In particular, we first examined whether the configuration of exploratory identified parenting styles differed when the – often neglected – psychological control dimension was considered in addition to the support and behavioral control dimensions. Secondly, we identified how parenting practices of mothers and fathers clustered together into joint parenting styles. We were particularly interested in exploring whether similarity or dissimilarity would depict the joint parenting styles. Incongruence could be expected from attachment or gender theories that particularly stress differences between parents’ roles, while assortative or socialization processes could result in highly congruent parenting styles. Thirdly, we associated these joint parenting styles to child behavioral outcomes. For incongruent parenting styles, we particularly examined whether the different parenting styles may buffer each other’s impact on child outcomes. For congruent parenting styles, we looked at additive effects in which parents’ (very) similar styles may reinforce each other’s impact on child outcomes.

Participants

Participants were 600 Flemish families with an elementary-school child (301 boys; 299 girls). The children’s age ranged from 8 to 10 years ( M =  9.27, SD  = 0.83). For 556 children both parents participated, while for the remaining children only the mother ( n  = 40) or father ( n  = 4) took part in the study. The participating mothers and fathers were on average 38.09 ( SD  = 4.00) and 40.39 years old ( SD  = 4.85), respectively. Most parents received 12 to 15 years of education. The vast majority of children (92%) were of Belgian origin (i.e., children and both parents born in Belgium). The remaining children mostly originated from another European country ( n =  28); a limited number had an African ( n  = 7), US ( n  = 4), Middle East ( n =  1), Asian ( n =  1) or unknown origin ( n  = 7). Most children (84%) lived in traditional two-parent families with married biological parents; others belonged to a blended family (5%), a household with shared custody (2%), or a single-parent household (9%). In this study, we focused on the subsample of families for which both parents consented to participate. Of the initial 556 families, data were available for a final sample of 527 families due to some non-response.

We used data on parenting collected in a Flemish large-scale study on social determinants of child psychosocial functioning including three cohorts: 8–, 9– and 10– year olds. To safeguard representativeness, a two-stage proportional stratified random sample of elementary school children enrolled in mainstream Flemish schools was drawn. In a first stage, 195 Flemish schools were randomly selected taking into account the distribution of schools across the five Flemish provinces and the Brussels region of which 55 schools agreed to participate. In a second stage, 913 children (2nd to 4th grade) were randomly selected within the participating schools. Parents received an introductory letter and consent form via the teachers. Informed consent to participate in the study was obtained for 600 families with both parents participating for 556 children. We used information on parenting practices collected from both parents. The parents received their questionnaires via the teacher during the second trimester and were asked to complete them individually and independently of each other. Given that 583 mothers (98%), and 538 fathers (96%) actually completed the questionnaire, non-response was fairly low.

Parental behavioral control

Parental behavioral control was operationalized via 19 items of the subscales Rules (8 items; α mother  = 0.79; α father  = 0.82)), Discipline (6 items; α mother  = 0.78; α father  = 0.80) and Harsh Punishment (5 items; α mother  = 0.76; α father  = 0.80) of the Ghent Parental Behavior Scale (Van Leeuwen and Vermulst 2004 ). Each item was scored on a 5–point Likert scale from 1 = never true to 5 = always true. The subscale Rules reflects the extent to which parents provide rules for their children’s behavior (e.g., “I teach my child that it is important to behave properly”; “I teach my child to obey rules”). The subscale Discipline pertains to effective punishments after unwanted behavior (e.g., ‘…taking away something nice’; ‘… give him/her a chore for punishment); whereas the subscale Harsh Punishment points towards parental physical punishment when children misbehave (e.g., “I slap my child in the face when he/she misbehaves”; “I spank my child when he/she doesn’t obey rules”; “I shake my child when we have a fight”). We included multiple subscales to represent the multidimensional nature of the behavioral control dimension, as demonstrated by others (Van Leeuwen and Vermulst 2004 ). In addition, we consider aspects of adequate (i.e., subscales Rules and Discipline) and inadequate behavioral control (i.e., subscale Harsh Punishment) in this study, given the differential association with child outcomes. While the first has been linked to positive child development, the latter has commonly been associated with negative child outcomes. Correlations between maternal and paternal reports were moderate for the subscales Rules ( r  = .31; p <  .001) and Discipline ( r  = 0.47; p <  0.001), but strong for the subscale Harsh Punishment ( r  = 0.52; p <  0.001). Within each parent, weak-to-moderate positive correlations were found between the subscales Rules and Discipline ( r mother  = 0.32; r father  = 0.26; p <  0.001); weak positive correlations between the subscales Discipline and Harsh Punishment ( r mother  = 0.22; r father  = 0.22; p <  0.001); and small negative correlations between the subscales Rules and Harsh Punishment ( r mother  = −0.14, p  = 0.009; r father  = −0.11; p =  0.001).

Parental support

Parental support was operationalized by 11 items (1 = never true to 5 = always true) of the subscale Positive Parenting of the Ghent Parental Behavior Scale (Van Leeuwen and Vermulst 2004 ). This subscale (α mother  = 0.85; α father  = 0.88) pertains to parental involvement, positive reinforcement and problem solving (e.g., “I make time to listen to my child, when he/she wants to tell me something”; “I give my child a compliment, hug, or a tap on the shoulder as a reward for good behavior”). Maternal and paternal reports were moderately correlated ( r  = 0.35, p <  0.001).

Parental psychological control

Parents assessed their own psychologically controlling behavior by means of a Dutch version of the Psychological Control Scale (Barber 1996 ; Kuppens et al. 2009a ) via a 5–point Likert scale from 1 = never true to 5 = always true. This scale (α mother  = 0.70; α father =  0.71) included 8 items pertaining to invalidating feelings, constraining verbal expressions, personal attack, and love withdrawal (e.g., “I am less friendly with my child when (s)he doesn’t see things my way”; “If my child has hurt my feelings, I don’t speak to him/her until (s)he pleases me again”; “I change the subject when my child has something to say”). Correlations between maternal and paternal reports were moderate ( r  = 0.32, p <  0.001).

Child behavioral outcomes

Both parents completed the 20-item Dutch Strengths and Difficulties Questionnaire (SDQ; van Widenfelt et al. 2003 ) using a 3–point scale in order to assess child psychosocial behavior (0 = not true to 2 = certainly true). Externalizing problems were operationalized via the subscales Conduct Problems (5 items; α mother  = .60; α father  = 0.61) and Hyperactivity (5 items; α mother =  0.80; α father  = 0.76), while internalizing problems were reflected by the subscale Emotional Symptoms (5 items; α mother =  0.73; α father  = 0.72). We also included the subscale on Prosocial Behavior (5 items; α mother =  0.67; α father  = 0.64). Because high correlations ( r =  0.54–0.71; p <  0.001) between mother and father reports was obtained, an average parental score was created for each subscale.

Data Analyses

To identify joint parenting styles, we conducted cluster analysis in MATLAB. Cluster analysis is an overarching term for procedures used to identify groups or clusters of individuals based on their scores on a number of variables (Everitt et al. 2001 ). Greater similarity emerges between individuals of the same cluster (or who lie geometrically closer according to some distance measure) than between individuals from different clusters (Steinly and Brusco 2011 ). We first ran a cluster analysis based on the four parenting subscales of mothers and fathers (i.e., eight variables as input) that reflect parental support and parental behavioral control to identify joint parenting styles based on these two parenting dimensions (i.e., without considering parental psychological control). To gain insight into the role of parental psychological control in identifying joint parenting styles, we subsequently conducted a cluster analysis on all five parenting subscales of mothers and fathers (i.e., ten variables as input) representing the three parenting dimensions.

We used the conceptual framework of Milligan for a stepwise implementation of cluster analysis (Steinly & Brusco 2011 ) by (1) determining the observations to be clustered; (2) selecting the variables to be included in the clustering procedure; (3) determining whether and how the selected variables should be standardized; (4) selecting a cluster algorithm and association measure (e.g., a distance measure); (5) determining the number of clusters; and (6) validating clustering (i.e., interpretation, testing, and replication). During steps 1 through 3, we performed analyses on the sum scores of the different parenting subscales which were standardized to give each variable equal weight in the analysis. In step 4, we chose Mac Queens K–means cluster algorithm which aims to identify K –clusters with the largest possible between–cluster differences and the smallest possible within–cluster differences (Everitt et al. 2001 ), while the value of K is specified by the user. K-means consists of a reallocation procedure by which persons, starting from an initial random or rational clustering, are reallocated in clusters as long as this yields a decrease in the loss function (i.e., sum of squared Euclidean distance from the corresponding cluster mean). Because the resulting clustering strongly depends on the initial clustering (Steinley 2003 ), we used 1000 random starts and retained the clustering with the lowest loss function value. To determine the optimal number of clusters in step 5, or in other words to define the value of K , we used the CHull procedure (Ceulemans and Kiers 2006 ; Wilderjans et al. 2013 ). CHull is an automated model selection procedure that scans a complexity versus fit plot to find the model with the best complexity versus fit balance. Applied to K-means clustering, this means that we look for the model after which allowing for additional clusters does not substantially decrease the loss function. To interpret the resulting clusters (step 6), we visually inspected the pattern emerging in the cluster profile plots. When comparing the cluster-specific profile scores between parents, we focused on the position of the corresponding profile scores compared to zero (i.e., the standardized mean of the sample) and differences in its substantial interpretation. For example, the terms above and below average mean that a parent scores higher or lower than the standardized mean of the sample.

To assess the validity of the empirically identified joint parenting styles representing all parenting dimensions, we examined their association with child behavioral outcomes via four analyses of variance (ANOVA) using SPSS Version 23 with the SDQ-subscales as dependent variables and the identified joint parenting styles based on the three parenting dimensions as the independent variable. Analyses of residuals did not reveal meaningful violations of model assumptions.

In the following sections, the empirically identified joint parenting styles based on the four subscales reflecting the two parenting dimensions ‘support’ and ‘behavioral control’ are first presented; followed by the results of analyses also considering ‘parental psychological control’ as input behavior. We end with linking the identified joint parenting styles based on three parenting dimensions to child behavioral outcomes.

Clusters with Two Parenting Dimensions

In a first step, we conducted a K –means cluster analysis on the maternal and paternal ratings only using the four parental support and behavioral support subscales for each parent (i.e., eight variables) as input, representing the two parenting dimensions. The analysis was conducted for 1 to 8 clusters each with a 1000 random starts. The corresponding number of clusters versus loss function plot is shown in Fig. ​ Fig.1. 1 . Applying the CHull procedure to this plot pointed towards a solution with four clusters.

Number of clusters vs. loss function plots for the cluster analyses based on the two parenting dimensions (left) and on the three parenting dimensions (right)

Parents belonging to the first cluster (Fig. ​ (Fig.2) 2 ) scored above average on positive parenting, rules and discipline; and scored below average on harsh punishment. A visual inspection of the cluster plot did not reveal notable differences between mothers and fathers. These parents show warmth and involvement in their interaction with their child, but at the same time set clear rules and expectations for children’s behavior. They also discipline the child’s undesirable behavior, but rarely use strict physical punishment when doing so. Because these parents demonstrate elevated support and (adequate) behavioral control levels, we labeled this parenting style as the congruent authoritative parenting style.

Cluster profiles of the analysis based on two parenting dimensions

Parents belonging to the second cluster (Fig. ​ (Fig.2) 2 ) also scored above average on positive parenting and rules, but clearly below average on effective (subscale Discipline) and harsh disciplining (subscale Harsh Punishment). Based on a visual inspection, levels of positive parenting and providing rules of mothers seemed somewhat higher, while effective discipline was somewhat lower compared to fathers, but the substantive interpretation was similar across parents. These parents show warmth and involvement in their parenting while also setting clear rules for children’s behavior, yet they hardly discipline their child in any manner after showing unwanted behavior. Because these parents showed elevated support levels combined with aspects of behavioral control that focus on promoting desired behavior (instead of discouraging unwanted behavior), we labeled this cluster as the congruent positive authoritative parenting style.

The third cluster (Fig. ​ (Fig.2) 2 ) included parents who scored clearly above average on harsh punishment, above average on discipline, and below average on positive parenting and rules; without any notable visual differences between mothers and fathers. These parents are therefore less warm and involved in the relationship with their child. Their parenting is particularly characterized by strict physical punishment following unwanted behavior, without setting clear rules for their children’s behavior. This cluster reflected the congruent authoritarian parenting style .

A fourth cluster (Fig. ​ (Fig.2) 2 ) was identified that yielded below average scores for both parents on all subscales; without salient visual differences between mothers and fathers. These parents do not show marked warmth and involvement with their child, and also do not prominently provide rules or discipline unwanted behavior. Because these parents demonstrated below average scores on both dimensions, we labeled this cluster as a congruent uninvolved parenting style.

Clusters with Three Parenting Dimensions

In a second step, we performed the same K –means cluster analysis, but now psychological control was included as a third parenting dimension. The analysis was again conducted for 1 to 8 clusters each time using 1000 random starts. Applying the CHull procedure to the number of clusters versus loss function plot (Fig. ​ (Fig.1) 1 ) pointed toward a solution with 2 or 3 clusters. However, to enable comparisons between the cluster solution based on the two parenting dimensions, we again selected the solution with four clusters of which the cluster profiles are visualized in Fig. ​ Fig.3 3 .

Cluster profiles of the analysis based on three parenting dimensions

When comparing both cluster solutions, a remarkable similarity in the cluster profiles was observed with the cluster scores on parental psychological control for the congruent authoritative, congruent positive authoritative and congruent authoritarian parenting styles covarying with scores on harsh punishment. These three clusters could thus be interpreted and labeled in a similar manner as earlier. For the congruent uninvolved parenting styles, the pattern for parental support and behavioral control remained fairly unchanged, but both showed slightly above-average psychological control scores. It seems that these parents are thus less supportive and behavioral controlling, yet showing somewhat elevated levels of psychologically intrusive practices. As such, we relabeled the congruent uninvolved cluster as a congruent intrusive parenting style. Adding the psychological control dimension slightly enlarged the differences between the scores of mothers and fathers within each parenting style, but the substantive interpretation remained similar across parents

Given the substantial similarity in emerging parenting styles after including two or three parenting dimensions, we computed the agreement in classification of the corresponding parents. Analyses revealed that parents were generally assigned to the same parenting style if psychological control was taken into account, (Cramer’s V  = .87). Note that the agreement was substantial regardless of the retained number of clusters (2 clusters: V =  .77; 3 clusters: V =  .86; 5 clusters: V =  .83; 6 clusters: V =  .69; 7 clusters: V =  .68; 8 clusters: V =  .65).

Parenting Styles and Child Behavioral Outcomes

The four joint parenting styles were associated to significantly different behavioral outcomes: Prosocial Behavior [ F (3, 520) = 20.15, p <  0.001, R 2 = 0.10]; Hyperactivity [ F (3, 520) = 12.98, p <  0.001, R 2 =  0.07]; Emotional Symptoms [ F (3, 520) = 3.77, p =  .011, R 2 = 0.02]; and Conduct Problems [ F (3, 520) = 20.15, p <  0.001, R 2 = 0.10]. The mean subscale score per joint parenting style are presented in Fig. ​ Fig.4. 4 . To gain more insight into the nature of the differences, pairwise contrasts (Tukey–Kramer) were computed for each ANOVA.

Mean subscale scores on child behavioral outcomes per parenting style

For each child behavioral outcome, a significant difference ( p  < 0.05) was established between the congruent authoritarian parenting style and at least one other parenting style. Children of authoritarian parents demonstrated more negative (i.e., hyperactivity, conduct problems, emotional symptoms) and less positive (i.e., prosocial behavior) child outcomes compared to children whose parents belonged to another parenting style. For conduct problems, the associated standardized mean difference involving authoritarian parents was most pronounced compared to positive authoritative parents ( d =  1.06, p <  0.001), whereas a medium difference (range d =  0.67 – 0.73, p <  .001) with the authoritative and intrusive parenting styles was found. Similarly, for hyperactivity standardized mean differences involving authoritarian parents were large ( d =  0.85, p <  0.001) compared to positive authoritative parents; and medium (range d =  0.60 – 0.63, p <  0.001) compared to authoritative and intrusive parents. Standardized mean differences involving authoritarian parents were large (range d =  0.83–0.93, p <  0.001) for prosocial behavior, but only a small difference ( d =  0.37, p =  0.031) with the intrusive parenting style emerged. Standardized mean differences for emotional symptoms between the authoritarian parenting style were small in magnitude (range d =  0.40 – 0.43, p <  0.05), except for a non-significant ( d =  0.28, p =  0.159) difference with the intrusive parenting style.

In addition, the congruent positive authoritative parenting style yielded significantly lower conduct problem levels in children (range d =  0.33 – 0.39, p <  0.05) compared to authoritative and intrusive parents. In contrast, significantly less prosocial child behavior (range d =  0.46–0.56, p ≤  0.001) was found for the congruent intrusive parenting style compared to (positive) authoritative parents.

With this study, we aimed to add to the parenting styles literature by identifying empirically derived joint parenting styles based on data regarding the three major parenting dimensions as perceived by both mothers and fathers raising elementary school children. These resulting joint parenting styles were subsequently associated with child behavioral outcomes. As highlighted in the introduction, the commonly used parenting typologies have a theoretical underpinning, although empirical studies have generally identified three or four similar parenting styles. Our empirically derived parenting styles based on the two parenting dimensions Support and Behavioral Control bear resemblance to the initial authoritative, authoritarian, and neglectful parenting styles, yet some differences also emerged.

The authoritative parenting style was further broken down into a disciplinary and non-disciplinary subtype. Similarly, although differences between parents within each parenting style were minor, they were more pronounced for the non-disciplinary than for the disciplinary control strategies. These findings highlight that all parenting practices aimed at controlling, managing or regulating child behavior are not necessarily simultaneously used by the same parent, suggesting that considering a variety of parenting practices is crucial to identifying naturally occurring parenting substyles. Some parents seem to provide clear rules, guidelines and expectations for child behavior, but hardly have deviant child behavior followed by an effective disciplinary strategy. One subgroup appears to reflect parents that mostly adopt positive parenting practices (i.e., high support, high rule setting), whereas another subgroup uses a combination of positive (i.e., high support, high rule setting) and negative (i.e., high effective discipline) parenting practices. The latter closely resembles the authoritative parenting style as originally defined (Baumrind 1966 , 1967 , 1971 ), while the former clustering aligns more with a second–order positive dimension obtained in research adopting a variable–oriented approach (Van Leeuwen et al. 2004 ).

In this study, the positive dimension tapped into parenting practices such as parental involvement, positive reinforcement, rule setting, and autonomy–stimulating behavior, while the negative dimensions pertained to negatively controlling efforts such as effective discipline, ignoring or harsh punishment following children’s unwanted behavior. In the uninvolved parenting style, parenting practices bear a resemblance to the neglectful parenting style given the below average scores on all subscales suggesting that parents show less warmth, place fewer restraints on and display little monitoring of children’s behavior. However, we did not identify extreme low scores on parenting dimensions that would suggest a truly neglectful parenting style as originally defined; thus an uninvolved parenting style seems a more appropriate label. Although parent self-reports could overestimate scores of positive parenting and underestimate scores of negative parenting due to social desirability bias, it should be noted that a previous study using adolescent reports also did not find extreme scores for the parenting style clusters (McKinney and Renk 2008 ).

We were not able to empirically identify the originally proposed permissive parenting style reflecting parents that are very loving, warm and involved (high support), yet have relatively few rules for children’s behavior and hardly discipline (low behavioral control). This finding diverges from some previous empirical studies in which the latter parenting style did emerge using an a theoretical (Aunola et al. 2000 ; Carlson and Tanner 2006 ; Shucksmith et al. 1995 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ) or empirical clustering approach (McKinney and Renk 2008 ). Our operationalization of the support dimension via the positive parenting subscale of the Ghent Parental Behavior Scale could underlie this divergent finding, because the subscale does not only pertain to warm and responsive parenting practices, but also includes items on problem solving. In contrast to other studies tapping only into warmth and responsiveness, lower scores on solving problems together with the child can attenuate overall scores on parental support. As a result, the pronounced scores on parental support which typify a permissive parenting style may have been somewhat masked in the present study. Alternatively, the parent self-reports may not accurately reflect their actual parenting practices due to a social desirability bias, hampering the identification of the permissive parenting style.

Regarding the role of psychological control in empirically deriving parenting styles, cluster analyses revealed a very similar configuration with four parenting styles when parental psychological control was taken into account. Thus, its addition did not lead to the identification of additional parenting styles, but the third parenting dimension did enhance our understanding. Results clearly pointed toward a substantial overlap between parental psychological control and parental harsh punishment for the congruent authoritarian, authoritative and positive authoritative parenting styles. This finding coincides with research suggesting that inadequate behavior control (e.g., physical punishment) and psychological control by parents are correlated, whereas parental psychological control and adequate behavioral control are considered orthogonal dimensions (Barber 1996 ; Gray andand Steinberg 1999 ; Steinberg 1990 ). For example, Pettit et al. ( 2001 ) found that parental psychological control was preceded in adolescence by harsh, restrictive disciplinary parenting during childhood. Barber and Harmon ( 2002 ) have further argued that parental psychological control may be a marker of a hostile and dysfunctional parent – child relationship, including the use of harsh disciplinary parenting practices.

For the congruent uninvolved parenting style, including parental psychological control actually led to an improved understanding of the previously considered uninvolved parents. As it turned out these parents did use psychologically controlling strategies to some extent, regardless of their lower levels on the other parenting dimension. This pattern could mean that in the parents–child relationship these parents are not so much concerned with the child and their behavior, but with manipulating children’s thoughts, emotions, and feelings to fit their own. It is commonly recognized that by using psychologically controlling strategies, parents intrude into children’s ‘psychological world’, exert parental authority over the children’s own life, and intervene in the individuation process (Barber and Xia 2013 ; Steinberg 2005 ). A recent study by Zhang et al. ( 2015 ) also demonstrated that parental psychological control indeed positively correlated with parent–centered intentions, implying that parents intend to satisfy their own needs by applying controlling behaviors with their children.

Several theories point towards differences in parenting between mother and father (McKinney and Renk 2008 ). For example, psychoanalytic theory argues that mothers are children’s primary attachment figure whereas a greater distance between fathers and their children occurs; the gender and role theory link differences in child rearing to male and female characteristics (e.g., expressiveness and instrumentality) with the traditional mother role as caring figures and fathers taking on the role of authority figure and family provider. The literature also indicates that differences in parenting between mothers and fathers may arise if one parent wants to compensate for the other parent (Meteyer and Perry-Jenkins 2009 ; Simons and Conger 2007 ). Nonetheless, our results revealed more similarities than dissimilarities in the parenting styles of both parents, despite small-to-moderate correlations between mother and father reports. These similarities may reflect an assortative process when choosing a partner, meaning that people tend to look for a partner with similar characteristics (Botwin et al. 1997 ; Buss 1984 , 1985 ; Larsen and Buss 2010 ). Similarity in parenting could also result from socialization processes (Simons and Conger 2007 ); through a process of mutual influence or reciprocity partners gradually form similar views and beliefs on parenting. The slight differences that emerged pertained particularly to a dissimilar position on positive parenting and rule setting. Although less pronounced, this finding aligns with the study by Meteyer and Perry-Jenkins ( 2009 ) that yielded congruent parenting styles for mothers and fathers of 7-year old children, except for a dissimilar position on self-reported parental warmth. Another study using adolescent reports of parenting (McKinney and Renk 2008 ) found more pronounced sex differences. Perhaps sex differences in parenting styles become more apparent as children grow older or when children’s perspectives are considered.

Results on associations between the joint parenting styles and child behavioral outcomes indicated that children of two authoritarian parents showed the poorest behavioral outcomes. These children were perceived as showing significantly more internalizing and externalizing problem behavior and less prosocial behavior compared to children of parents adopting other parenting styles. In contrast, children of two positive authoritative parents demonstrated the lowest levels of conduct problems. These findings could suggest an additive effect in which the impact of similar parenting styles is reinforced as having two authoritarian and two positive authoritative parents was associated with the least and most favorable child behavioral outcomes, respectively.

The obtained associations between parenting styles and child behavioral outcomes partially align with previous research. Firstly, it has repeatedly been demonstrated that an authoritative parenting style coincides most with positive developmental outcomes in children (e.g., Aunola et al. 2000 ; Baumrind 1967 , 1971 , 1989 , 1991 , Darling and Steinberg 1993 ; Dornbusch et al. 1987 ; Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Querido et al. 2002 ; Shucksmith et al. 1995 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ; Steinberg et al. 1992 ). Our findings confirm this pattern for the children having parents who employ an authoritative parenting style, but children with parents both using a positive authoritative parenting style even showed less conduct problems. This finding could point towards the value of rule setting – in contrast to disciplinary strategies – in preventing behavioral problems. However, as parenting is a reciprocal process with children and parents mutually influencing each other, it is equally likely that parents show less disciplinary strategies simply because their children pose fewer behavior problems as demonstrated by others (Kerr et al. 2012 ; Kuppens et al. 2009b ; Laird et al. 2003 ).

Secondly, previous research has repeatedly linked an authoritarian parenting style with externalizing and internalizing behavior problems in children (e.g., Hoeve et al. 2008 ; Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ; Williams et al. 2009 ; Wolfradt et al. 2003 ). The present findings extend this body of research, although the association was most pronounced for externalizing behavior problems which may be due to children’s age (8 to 10 year olds). In younger children, having authoritarian parents may be more strongly associated with externalizing problem behavior, whereas the association with internalizing problems only emerges as children grow older. The shift in the nature of behavior problems as children age has been linked to the physical, cognitive and social maturation of children and the associated changes in social demands and expectations.

Thirdly, the neglectful parenting style has been associated with the poorest developmental outcomes in children (Baumrind 1991 ; Lamborn et al. 1991 ; Mandara and Murray 2002 ; Shucksmith et al. 1995 ; Steinberg et al. 1994 ). As this parenting style did not emerge in the present study, we were not able to model its association with child outcomes. Even children having parents who were less involved, but intrusive, were doing better than children having authoritarian parents. Findings did reveal that prosocial behavior and conduct problems were significantly lower for children having parents who adopted an intrusive parenting style compared to children of (positive) authoritarian parents. This findings coincides with a growing body of evidence on the deleterious of impact of psychologically controlling parenting in children and adolescents adopting a variable approach (Barber et al. 2005 ; Kuppens et al. 2013 ; Soenens et al. 2012 ), but likewise extends this evidence-base with person-oriented findings on the impact of an intrusive parenting style on child development.

Limitations and Future Research

Although the present study has several merits, it falls short in that only parent self-reports were used to assess parenting and child behavioral outcomes; children’s perspective on their parenting practices may be quite different. For example, Smetana ( 1995 ) found that adolescents perceived their parents as being more permissive and authoritarian compared to parents’ own view on the matter, whereas parents perceived themselves as being more authoritative than their adolescent children. Although a significant convergence between child and parent reports on parenting dimensions has been established in elementary school (Kuppens et al. 2009a ), future research should explicitly take a multiple informant approach when identifying parenting styles as informant perspectives on parenting styles in this age period may differ. In a related vein, multiple informant assessments of child behavioral problems have been shown to be context–specific with differences occurring according to the context (e.g., home, school) that forms the basis for informant’s assessment (Achenbach et al. 1987 ). Involving informants other than parents in the assessment of child behavioral outcomes therefore seems particularly interesting in future research on parenting styles.

Furthermore, inspecting a normally developing sample generally results into a low occurrence of inadequate parenting practices and child behavioral problems. Studying parenting styles in a clinical sample could certainly supplement this view because more variation in parenting practices may yield more or different parenting styles. Hoeve et al. ( 2008 ) have conducted one of the few studies using a sample of children with a high or low risk of antisocial and behavioral problems; and they were able to identify a neglectful parenting style. In addition, the role of parental psychological control in identifying parenting styles may be more pronounced in a clinical sample; an issue that to date remains unresolved.

The present sample closely resembled the population distribution with regard to family composition and paternal educational level, but it was rather homogeneous for ethnicity and mothers were more highly educated. As such, the present findings may not generalize to minority groups or families with less educated mothers; an issue that should be resolved by future studies. For example, previous research has demonstrated that harsh punishment and psychological control are more common among lower SES parents (e.g., Eamon 2001 ; El‐Sheikh et al. 2010 ) and that Caucasian caregivers were more prevalent in an authoritative parenting style cluster (van der Horst and Sleddens 2017 ). The present study clearly complements the scarce body of research on naturally occurring joint parenting styles conducted in US samples, but additional research is needed to replicate these findings. Moreover, as parenting occurs within a cultural belief system that influences attitudes towards particular parenting practices (Durrant et al. 2003 ), cross-cultural research could further clarify the role of culture in identifying naturally occurring (joint) parenting styles incorporating three parenting dimensions. Finally, the cross-sectional associations among joint parenting styles and child outcomes should be complemented by longitudinal research to gain more insight into the directionality of these associations. Longitudinal research covering the entire childhood and adolescence period could also increase our understanding of age-of-child and sex-of parent differences in naturally occurring parenting styles.

Despite these limitations, this study adds to the literature by further empirically validating well-known parenting styles and by increasing our understanding of the role of parental psychological control and joint parenting. The overlap between harsh punishment and parental psychological control in congruent parenting styles and its unique role in the uninvolved parenting style suggests that this intrusive parenting dimension should be routinely considered in practice settings. We also found that adequate behavior controlling practices may be particularly interesting in preventing behavioral problems; and that not only an authoritarian but also a (psychologically) intrusive parenting style can impede upon child development.

Author Contributions

SK: designed and executed the study, conducted part of the data-analysis, and wrote the paper. EC: conducted the cluster analyses, and collaborated in the writing and editing of the final manuscript.

Conflict of Interest

The authors declare that they have no conflict of interest.

Ethical Approval

All procedures performed in this study were in accordance with the ethical standards of the KU Leuven (University of Leuven) and with the 1964 Helsinki declaration and its later amendments or comparable ethical standards.

Informed Consent

Informed consent was obtained from all individual participants included in the study.

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What Are the 4 Types of Parenting Styles?

Categories Development , Theories

All parents have their own approach to child-rearing, but psychologists have also identified distinctive parenting styles that can impact child development . Today, psychologists suggest that there are four major parenting styles:

• Authoritarian parenting
• Authoritative parenting
• Permissive parenting
• Uninvolved/Neglectful parenting

As you might imagine, these different parenting styles are marked by distinctive behavior and communication patterns. These parenting styles can play an important role in early childhood development and development in later childhood, adolescence, and even into adulthood.

Each style can leave a mark on how a child develops, so parents need to understand how their styles might impact their children. By learning more about parenting styles, you can better understand your strengths and weaknesses as a parent.

Table of Contents

What Are Parenting Styles?

While developmental psychologists have long been interested in learning more about the effect of parental behavior on children, pinpointing exact cause-and-effect relationships between these variables is not always easy.

Researchers have discovered four distinctive patterns of parental behavior known as parenting styles. Each of these types of parenting can have an impact on children’s health and development.

It was during the 1960s that psychologist Diana Baumrind performed research on pre-school age kids, utilizing parent interviews, observations, and naturalistic observation to study different dimensions of parenting. Using her observations, she concluded that parents differed on a few essential factors, which she identified as:

• Disciplinary strategies
• Expectations of maturity and control
• Warmth and nurturing
• Communication styles

Based on her research, Baumrind described three different parenting styles. Later research by Maccoby and Martin led to the addition of another parenting style. Today, researchers recognize four distinct parenting styles.

Authoritarian Parenting

The authoritarian parenting style is characterized by a very high level of control with little communication and warmth.

Authoritarian parents tend to seem militant, expecting a great deal of self-control and obedience from their children. They have strict rules but offer little instruction or feedback to their children.

Signs you might be an authoritarian parent:

• Do you have a lot of rules that you expect your children to understand and follow without question or explanation?
• Are there harsh consequences if your children disobey or break your rules?
• Do you rarely express warmth or affection for your child?
• Do you believe that children should be seen and not heard?
• Do you rarely consider your child’s feelings?

If you can answer yes to some or most of these questions, then you might be an authoritarian parent.

The bad news is that this parenting style is often associated with lower self-esteem and a lack of self-control in children. Because kids never learn to set their own limits and receive very little feedback from their parents, they never develop the skills they need to self-regulate.

Authoritative Parenting

The authoritative parenting style is characterized by high expectations, but unlike the authoritarian style, these parents provide a great deal of support and guidance for their children.

Authoritative parents set rules, but they also explain these rules and set clear and fair expectations. When kids make mistakes, parents offer consistent discipline but also make sure that their children know why they are in trouble and how they can avoid such trouble again.

Signs that you might be an authoritative parent:

• Do you expect a lot of your kids but also provide the support they need to meet your expectations?
• Do you listen to your kids and offer guidance and assistance?
• Is having a positive relationship with your children important?
• Are you consistent about how you enforce the rules of your household?

If you can answer yes to some or most of these questions, then you probably have an authoritative parenting style.

The good news is that the authoritative parenting style is typically identified as the best approach to parenting. Kids who grow up with authoritative parents tend to be more self-regulated and independent as they grow older. Authoritative parents also tend to raise happier and more successful children.

Why is authoritative parenting superior to other styles? Because these parents have high but reasonable expectations of their kids while also providing the support and communication kids need to be successful.

Kids can see that their parents’ rules are fair, and they internalize these standards over time. Children are then able to develop an internal sense of right and wrong as well as the self-regulation skills that they need to control their behavior.

Permissive Parenting

The permissive parenting style is characterized by low expectations but high levels of responsiveness. These parents let their children do whatever they please with little guidance.

There are few rules to follow and no consequences when the few existing rules are broken. Permissive parents are, however, very warm and loving. Their kids may feel that their parents are more of good friends rather than parental figures.

Signs that you might be a permissive parent:

• Are there few, if any, rules you expect your kids to follow?
• Do you feel more like your child’s friend than his or her parent?
• When you do set rules, you don’t follow through and enforce any consequences.
• Do you feel like it’s better for your kid to learn from experience rather than offering any guidance or advice?

If you can answer yes to some or all of these questions, then the chances are good that you are a permissive parent.

The negative news is that this style tends to result in children who have little motivation and self-control. Kids raised by permissive parents tend to have lower self-esteem, struggle academically, and experience more behavioral problems. These kids also tend to struggle with authority and report feeling less happy than their peers.

Uninvolved Parenting

Uninvolved or neglectful parenting is characterized by both low expectations and low responsiveness.

In some cases, uninvolved parents are simply unconcerned with their kids yet still provide for their most basic needs. In extreme cases, these parents may be outright neglectful, ignoring even the simplest needs that their children may have.

Signs of uninvolved or neglectful parenting:

• Do you rarely see your child?
• Do you frequently not know where your child is or who he is with?
• Do you never ask your child about how their life is going?
• Do you ever forget to feed, bathe, or otherwise care for your child?

If you have answered yes to any of these questions, then you may be in danger of being an uninvolved or neglectful parent.

Unfortunately, kids raised by such parents may not fare well in life. Kids raised by such parents tend to do poorly in all life domains, including socially, academically, and emotionally.

How Do Parenting Styles Affect Children?

Parenting styles can affect many areas of child development, including cognitive, social, and emotional well-being.

• Cognitive development : Kids raised in supportive environments are more likely to be flexible, independent thinkers. Children who lack adequate support may struggle with critical thinking, creativity, and academic performance.
• Social development : Authoritative parenting styles are more likely to produce children with good social skills and strong interpersonal relationships. Children raised in permissive or uninvolved households may struggle with boundaries and attachment issues.
• Emotional development : Authoritarian parenting produces children with strong emotional intelligence who are good at regulating their own emotions. Children raised by authoritarian parents may struggle with self-expression, while those from permissive or uninvolved households may struggle with self-control and poor self-esteem.
• Mental health : Authoritarian parenting is associated with positive mental health outcomes, while those raised in with other parenting styles may struggle with mental health challenges.

Assessing Parenting Styles

As you read more about parenting styles, you might start analyzing your own relationships with both your parents and children. In some instances, you might even feel that your own parenting skills might be lacking.

However, it is important to remember that while the descriptions of these styles make them seem very discrete, many different factors influence a child’s relationship with caregivers.

Factors that can influence how parents interact with their children include:

• The temperament of the parent
• The child’s personality
• Situational variables
• Relationships with other family members

One single parenting style may seem “ideal,” but all kids are unique, and what they need from their parents may differ depending upon their children’s needs. What may seem comforting to one child may seem stifling and oppressive to another.

Large-scale twin studies suggest that genetics and the environment play about a 50/50 role in shaping child development. How people parent makes up an important part of that environmental aspect of influence.

Most Common Parenting Styles

While the exact prevalence of each parenting style isn’t clear, some research suggets that the authoritative style tends to be the most common, while uninvolved is the least common.

According to these statistics:

• 46% to 49% are authoritative parents
• 23% to 26% are authoritarian parents
• 18% to 20% are perimissive parents
• 8% to 10% are uninvolved parents

Can You Change Your Parenting Style?

You might immediately notice as you read these descriptions that you might not always fit perfectly into one style.

Sometimes you are more authoritative, but you might be more permissive or authoritarian in other situations. This is perfectly normal and quite common.

You might also recognize that you tend to exhibit more of one style while your spouse exhibits another. In such situations, it pays to consider how you respond to your children and work on developing a consistent approach to parenting and discipline.

While you might naturally tend toward a different style, making a conscious approach to be a more authoritative parent can pay off. Your children will then be better able to reap the benefits of a more authoritative parenting approach.

Modern Parenting Styles

In addition to the four core parenting styles described by Baumrind and other researchers, there are a number of other parenting approaches that have been identified in recent years. Some examples include:

• Helicopter Parenting : Helicopter parents are overly involved and tend to hover over their children, closely monitoring and directing their activities to ensure success and safety.
• Tiger Parenting : Tiger parents are characterized by high demands for academic achievement and strict discipline. They emphasize hard work, academic excellence, and extracurricular success.
• Free-Range Parenting : Free-range parents encourage independence and self-reliance in their children by allowing them more freedom to explore and make decisions on their own within safe boundaries.
• Attachment Parenting : Attachment parenting is centered on creating emotional bonds between parents and children by engaging in parenting practices such as baby-wearing, co-sleeping, and responsive caregiving.
• Conscious Parenting : Conscious parenting involves being aware and present in the moment, making intentional and mindful choices in parenting, and fostering a deep connection with the child.
• Simplicity Parenting : Simplicity parenting emphasizes creating a simpler, less cluttered environment for children, with a focus on quality over quantity in terms of toys, activities, and experiences.
• Positive Parenting : Positive parenting involves using positive reinforcement and open communication to encourage desirable behaviors in children, promoting a supportive and nurturing environment.
• Lawnmower Parenting : Lawnmower parents strive to remove obstacles and challenges from their children’s paths, clearing the way for smooth and obstacle-free experiences.
• Gentle Parenting : Gentle parenting emphasizes empathy, understanding, and respectful communication, aiming to guide children with kindness and positive reinforcement rather than punishment.
• Slow Parenting : Slow parenting encourages a more relaxed and unhurried approach to parenting, prioritizing quality time, meaningful experiences, and allowing for a slower pace of life for both parents and children.

Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. The Journal of Early Adolescence , 11(1), 56–95. https://doi.org/10.1177/0272431691111004

Benson, JB, Marshall, MH. Social and Emotional Development in Infancy and Early Childhood . Oxford: Academic Press; 2009.

Farrant, B. M., Devine, T. A. J., Maybery, M. T., & Fletcher, J. (2012). Empathy, perspective taking and prosocial behaviour: The importance of parenting practices. Infant and Child Development , 21(2), 175–188. https://doi.org/10.1002/icd.740

Matejevic, M., Todorovic, J., & Jovanovic, A. D. (2014). Patterns of family functioning and dimensions of parenting style. Procedia – Social and Behavioral Sciences , 141, 431–437. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.sbspro.2014.05.075

Pong, S., Johnston, J., & Chen, V. (2010). Authoritarian parenting and asian adolescent school performance: Insights from the us and taiwan. International Journal of Behavioral Development , 34(1), 62–72. https://doi.org/10.1177/0165025409345073

What Are the 4 Types of Parenting Styles and Which One is Right for You?

Rebekah Pierce

No one approach to parenting suits everyone. That’s why there’s a huge range of different parenting styles that we adopt when bringing up our children.

We have described the parenting strategies of renowned child psychologists such as Diana Baumrind and John Bowlby, reviewed research on child behavior published by the National Library of Medicine and Virginia Commonwealth University, and provided our own examples to help parents identify the four types of parenting styles and find out which one will work best for them, as well as how to improve their current parenting style to be more effective regardless of the type.

What Is A Parenting Style?

Authoritative, authoritarian, how does each style affect children, attachment theory in adolescence, other parenting styles, what is the best parenting style, how to make every parenting style even more effective.

Prostock-studio/Shutterstock.com

A parenting style is a way of bringing up your child with a specific approach. The parenting style you adopt may differ based on your personality and preferences, or maybe it could depend on your child.

There are four types of parenting styles, most of which have been outlined by legendary psychologist Diana Baumrind.

The three types outlined by Baumrind include the ‘Authoritarian’ style, the ‘Authoritative’ style, and the ‘Permissive’ style.

After further research was carried out on this topic, a fourth style was added to this list by psychologists John Martin and Eleanor Maccoby. This style was known as ‘Uninvolved’ or ‘Neglectful’ parenting.

Research has shown that these four parenting styles may have a huge effect on a child’s educational success and career path.

A study conducted at Shiraz University of Medical Sciences found a negative correlation between the authoritarian parenting style and a child’s educational success. Results also showed us that there was a significant positive correlation between a ‘Firm’ style and the child’s career path.

4 Types of Baumrind’s Parenting Styles

Types of parenting styles

The styles of parenting that Baumrind outlined vary depending on the 2 main factors—’Responsiveness’» and ‘Demandingness’.

The difference in styles was decided based on whether a parent was a highly responsive or low-responsive parent, and whether they were a highly demanding or low-demanding parent.

Understanding your personal parenting style is the first step to becoming an effective parent. There are several recognized types of parenting styles that have been studied extensively in the field of child development. These distinct parenting styles can significantly shape a child’s upbringing and future outlook.

Described in 3 words: Supportive, Firm, Fair.

The authoritative parenting style is coined by its high responsiveness and high demandingness.

This style of parenting involves the parent offering an abundance of support to their child. This involves the parents helping their child to progress and become the best version of themselves, guiding them to become successful.

The authoritative style also implements high standards for behavior and attitude—this style demands the child to respect their parents. There are set rules involved that your child should follow, however, the rules are always fully explained so your child can acknowledge the meaning behind them.

When following this style of parenting, you’re ensuring that you’re consistently building a positive parent-child relationship .

Out of the 3 parenting styles founded by Baumrind, this was her favorite. The authoritative style brings together strict rules, emotional support, and guidance to help your child grow into the best version of themselves.

About 46% of American parents use an  authoritative parenting style . An example of authoritative parenting is when parents calmly explain why it’s essential to clean the room and check how their children feel about it. In addition, they might offer incentives or rewards for completing the task.

Described in 3 words: Strict, Disengaged, Demanding.

The authoritarian style of parenting differs from the authoritative approach.

This parenting style is based on a clear set of strict rules—which are often enforced with consequential punishments if they’re not obeyed.

The authoritarian parenting style, marked by strict rules and high expectations, aims to instill discipline. Whilst parents who adopt this approach demand a lot from their child, they’re also very low in terms of responsiveness—they can often be disengaged from their child’s life, offering little to no guidance or support, unlike the authoritative style.

An authoritarian parent also disregards their child’s feelings or opinions on any given topic—another sign of little to no emotional support for their child, which can harm their self-esteem.

Example: A parent might take away the child’s phone or restrict their access to TV or video games for mild infractions like getting a B on a test instead of an A. 

Described in 3 words: Laidback, Forgiving, Tolerant.

As a permissive parent, you may outline rules, but you fail to enforce them.

Your attitude toward parenting is very laid back—you feel that your kids will ultimately find their path in life and learn from their own mistakes.

However, this doesn’t mean permissive parents tend not to support their children. If there’s ever a serious issue, the parent will always step in to offer guidance and support.

This parenting style is more friend-like than parent-like. Although you’ll listen to your child’s issues, wants, and needs, you prefer to take a backstep and allow them to figure things out for themselves.

While permissive parenting may foster independence, it can sometimes lead to challenges in setting limits. If a child misbehaves or disobeys the rules set by their permissive parents, they will likely have little to no consequence which could reinforce bad behavior.

That said, there are some positive aspects associated with permissive parenting. It can lead to children having higher self-esteem, lower rates of depression, and better social skills. 

Example: A permissive parent might allow their child to set their bedtime or choose what they want to eat for dinner.

Described in 3 words: Disengaged, Distant, Uninvolved.

This style of parenting was discovered by psychologists John Martin and Eleanor Maccoby.

Neglectful parenting is the most undesirable style of parenting to choose from. Neglectful parents often leave their kids to their own devices, whilst offering no support or guidance that would otherwise help them to grow into the best version of themselves.

There are no clear set rules for the child to follow, meaning they’re likely to misbehave more frequently.

This parenting style isn’t always intentional—the parent could be struggling with many other issues which inadvertently means the child becomes a secondary priority.

The child’s wants, needs, opinions, and emotions will often go completely unnoticed, leaving them feeling unwanted and unfulfilled.

Example: An example of a neglectful parent would be someone who is often absent, fails to provide basic needs such as food, clothing, and shelter, or has no interest in their child’s academic performance or social life.

Some parents lean towards being permissive parents, allowing their children a great deal of freedom and autonomy. In contrast, the authoritative parenting style emphasizes a balanced approach, combining warmth and clear boundaries. While permissive parenting may foster independence, it can sometimes lead to challenges in setting limits.

It’s essential to explore the characteristics and effects of these different parenting styles to find the best fit for your family. The authoritarian parenting style, marked by strict rules and high expectations, aims to instill discipline. In contrast, the authoritative parenting style encourages open dialogue and mutual respect between parents and children.

Each of the perceived parenting styles can affect children in different ways:

• Authoritative parenting can have a profoundly positive effect on children. Children who were brought up with this style of parenting feel nurtured, loved, and guided in the right direction. They will often become more successful in terms of educational achievements and careers.
• Authoritarian parenting can have a somewhat negative impact on children. Children are more likely to become resentful towards their parents, as they’re constantly being punished instead of guided to make better decisions. Children with authoritarian parents may feel unloved and unheard as the parents usually spend little time bonding with their children.
• Permissive parents can make their kids feel like they have no proper guidance or support. Children of permissive parents may struggle in terms of education and careers as a direct consequence of no real parental support. Bad habits may be formed relating to eating habits and hygiene , meaning the child is at higher risk of becoming unwell.
• Neglectful parenting can leave children feeling completely unguided, unheard, and unloved. The long-term effect of this parenting style can be devastating. Children with neglectful parents may have huge confidence issues, become unhappy or even depressed, and may perform poorly in terms of their education and career.

These distinct parenting styles can significantly shape a child’s upbringing and future outlook. It’s essential to explore the characteristics and effects of these different parenting styles to find the best fit for your family.

Attachment Theory

The Attachment Theory was first established by UK-based psychologist, John Bowlby. Bowlby carried out an extensive range of studies in the ‘50s and ‘80s.

Bowlby’s stated how children feel scared and alone when separated from their primary caregivers—their parents. As babies are vulnerable and can’t defend themselves, they tend to cry for help when they’re separated from their parents—an instinctive behavior.

In simple terms, Bowlby’s theory suggests that in a child’s early years (0–3 years), the level of attachment a child develops with their parents directly affects their future relationships—both with their parents and everyone else. Attachment parenting is a crucial part of child development and if done incorrectly, can lead to mental health issues, self-esteem issues, and many other issues later on.

The Attachment theory—although it is mainly related to a child’s early years—states that the solidity of a child-to-parent bond can have a significant impact on how a child acts during their teenage years.

Research has shown a significant correlation between the strength of the attachment a child has to their parents and how the child grows through adolescence.

Children with stronger attachments with their parents were less likely to partake in behaviors such as underage drinking, drug use, and sexual activity.

Teenage girls who have stronger bonds with their parents directly correlate with lower teenage pregnancy rates, fewer body-image issues, and lower rates of eating disorders.

Teenagers who were securely attached to their parents were also less likely to develop mental health issues, such as depression and anxiety.

As well as the major four parenting styles that we’ve already outlined previously, there are many other styles that parents can employ when bringing up their children.

Other styles include ‘Unconditional Parenting’, ‘Holistic Parenting’, and ‘Nurturant Parenting’:

• Unconditional parenting is characterized by its approach to accepting the child’s actions and behaviors no matter what—allowing them to be themselves. This reinforces the child’s individuality and enables them to grow up feeling accepted for who they are, no matter how they act.
• Holistic parenting is where parents encourage their children to explore their individual beliefs. This involves not enforcing any religious views on your child. Also, instead of setting strict rules, you should instead lead by example.
• Nurturant parenting (also known as ‘Slow Parenting’) is characterized by its steady approach. Instead of rushing to form relationships and setting rules, this style of parenting requires parents to take more time to form meaningful connections with their children. The nurturant parenting style reinforces the fact that life is a journey, where children can constantly learn and progress.

When deciding on the parenting style you wish to adopt, it’s wise to consider the impact it will have on your children in later life. Although it’s important to choose a style that suits you, you must ensure that your child can form secure attachments to you, which will ultimately set them up for a positive and prosperous future.

The most effective parenting style, as stated by developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind herself, is the Authoritative style.

Of all the different parenting styles, authoritative parenting has proven to have the most positive effect on children. It accounts for 93% of children with positive behavior, according to the National Institutes of Health. 

The combination of guidance, support, and rules which are enforced, are all strong elements that enable a child to grow into the greatest version of themselves.

Children who have been brought up by authoritative parents are more likely to achieve academic success, as well as success in their careers.

With authoritative parenting, the child feels nurtured and loved, which will help with their confidence and self-esteem as they grow and develop. Also, authoritative parenting emphasizes a balanced approach, combining warmth and clear boundaries.

Parenting comes with its own set of challenges, and each parent has their unique parenting style. As a parent, it is essential to find a balance that suits your family’s needs and effectively nurtures your child’s growth and development.

Although each parenting style is unique, there are ways to make every parenting style more effective.

• Understanding Your Child. Every child is unique, and having a solid understanding of their personality can aid you in knowing how to communicate with them, how to best set limits, and how they should be rewarded. Also, take time to understand yourself. One parenting style might not jive well with your personality, but one other (or a blend of others) might be the perfect match.
• Communicate. A positive and open conversation can help even the firmest or most gentle parenting style, connect and understand their child better.
• Consistency. Regardless of your parenting style and parenting practices, consistent discipline, and expectations are necessary. Be consistent in setting limits and consequences for your children’s actions.
• Lead by Example. Children often mimic what they observe in their parents, so it is important to embody the qualities that you would like your child to have.
• Be Flexible. Listen to your children’s opinions and, rather than being strict authoritarian parents, consider using positive discipline strategies to quell child behavior problems instead.
• Rely on Tools. While the tips above will help you become a more effective parent, sometimes, it just makes sense to lean on technology a bit. The Findmykids app can help you become a more effective parent in all kinds of different ways.

The Findmykids app can be seamlessly integrated into any parenting style, whether you’re an authoritarian parent or a bit more laid back. With features like GPS tracking and geofencing, you’ll always know where your child is and be able to set boundaries as needed.

Plus, the app allows for seamless communication between parents and children, ensuring that everyone stays connected and informed. By using the Findmykids app, you can have peace of mind and be a better parent, no matter how you choose to raise your child.

Parenting Styles: The Bottom Line

As you can see, there is a huge range of different parenting styles—all of which have their pros and cons.

Parenting styles are something you may want to seriously consider researching further to ensure your child is brought up in the best way possible.

It’s worth noting how each style can impact your child, especially in terms of how they bond with you in their early years. The attachments your child forms during this period can have a significant effect on their mental health in adolescence and later life.

Not all styles will suit your preferences. You may wish to be more lenient or set more rules. Choosing a style can be difficult, and there’s no such thing as a «one size fits all» approach.

You may choose to use elements from all different styles of parenting, depending on the age of your child or the situations you’re faced with.

If you want to learn more about different parenting styles, including Helicopter Parenting, then check out this awesome blog we’ve just posted for you.

What is the most common parenting style?

The most common parenting style is authoritative. This parenting style is characterized by high responsiveness and high expectations. Authoritative parents are attentive, supportive, and set clear boundaries for their children—they give their children the freedom to make their own decisions but are invested in supporting healthy growth as well.

Can you mix parenting styles?

Yes, it is possible and even common for parents to mix different parenting styles, but it is important to understand that mixing parenting styles can be confusing for the child and can make it difficult for them to understand what is expected of them. It is recommended that parents prioritize their child’s needs and use a consistent approach when it comes to discipline and decision-making.

How can I determine my parenting style?

Ask yourself the following questions: do you set clear and consistent boundaries? Are you attentive and supportive of your child’s needs? How do you discipline your child? Once you have answers to these questions, you might be able to identify a particular parenting style that suits you.

What are some common mistakes parents make when it comes to parenting styles?

One common mistake that parents make is being too permissive, which can make it difficult for children to understand boundaries and limits. On the other hand, being too authoritarian can make children fearful and rebellious. Another mistake that parents make is not recognizing their child’s individual needs and temperament, so parents should be responsive to their child’s unique needs and adapt their parenting style accordingly.

References:

• The Power of Positive Parenting | Patient and Family Education | UC Davis Children Hospital: https://health.ucdavis.edu/children/patient-education/Positive-Parenting
• Parenting Styles – Culture and Psychology: https://open.maricopa.edu/culturepsychology/chapter/parenting-styles/
• How understanding your child’s unique nature can make you a more effective parent – VCU News – Virginia Commonwealth University: https://news.vcu.edu/article/2021/09/how-understanding-your-childs-unique-nature-can-make-you-a-more-effective-parent
• Understanding and Improving Your Parenting Style – Y Magazine: https://magazine.byu.edu/article/understanding-improving-parenting-style/

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Parenting Styles: Types, Examples, And Consequences

When you think of how your parent raised you, much of what you remember might be related to their parenting style. Once you become a parent yourself, you develop your style, and this will be a part of what your children will remember, too. Understanding parenting styles and their results can help you become more self-aware and better prepared to be the kind of parent you want to be.

What is a parenting style?

Each parent develops their way of dealing with their child. There are four recognized styles, but because parents often use different parenting styles at various times, each parent has their unique blend of styles. So, what is a style of parenting?

Parenting style: Definition

A style of parenting is a set of strategies you use to raise your child. Researchers have come up with four basic parenting style categories called the Baumrind parenting styles. Each style has its unique characteristics.

Types of parenting styles

The four Baumrind parenting styles are:

Authoritative

Permissive/Indulgent

Uninvolved/Neglectful

Authoritarian/Disciplinarian

Authoritative parenting style

The  authoritative parenting  style is usually considered the most helpful for children in most instances. It is also known as the most effective and  positive parenting  style. When parents are acting in the authoritative style, they focus on nurturing their children. Authoritative parents support their children and respond readily to their needs.

When parents use an authoritative style, they explain things to their children and take the time to listen to them. Authoritative parents reason with their children, although they may not agree with them on all points. Authoritative parents are their children's leaders and guides, as well as the ones who set important rules. The rules they set aren't excessive, but they're clear and consistent.

Authoritative parents expect much of their children, but they allow them to help set their own goals. Rather than pushing their children beyond what they can reasonably do, authoritative parents communicate with them often to help them achieve.

Imagine that a parent would like a child to get involved in after-school activities. If the parent is acting in an authoritative mode, they talk to the child about what kind of activity they would like to do. After listening to the child's opinion, the parent decides whether it is a good option for their child. They tell their child their decision and explain why they chose that option, and make sure that the child genuinely understands. 

The authoritative parent might ask the child how they can help them get started. Authoritative parents make sure the child has what they need for the activity and talks to them frequently about their progress after they begin.

In this example, a teenager has secretly skipped school. The authoritative parent finds out about it and goes to the teen to talk about what happened and why they made that choice. The parent listens to the teen but also explains why they're disappointed and need to set limits.

Earlier in the teen's life, the parent has already let their child know that they always need to go to school unless they have permission to be absent. So, the teen isn't surprised when the parent explains the consequences of their actions. The parent then makes sure the child faces the consequences.

Consequences of authoritative parenting

Children whose parents have mostly used authoritative parenting tend to be healthy and well-adjusted. These children often have the following characteristics:

Independent

Self-controlled

Interested in finding out about their world

Cooperative

Focused on achievement

Permissive or indulgent parenting style

Someone who parents in the permissive style is typically warm and kind to them. However, they don't set limits for them or have any firm expectations for good behavior. They may not know what their child is doing and may not know whether they are displaying maturity appropriate to their age. The parent and the child seem more like friends.

The school year starts, and the child comes home with a form to fill out to choose after-school activities. The permissive parent might look over the sheet and tell the child how fun an activity would be.

However, if the child says they don't want to do any, the parent says it's okay. If they don't want to do it, they don't have to. The parent doesn't try to find out why or talk to the child about why it's a good idea to get involved. The parent drops the subject. 

This is the situation where the teenager skips school. The parent finds out. They might or might not let the teen know that they've discovered they weren't at school. If the parent does ask them about it, they let the child control the conversation. They might tell them what they did was wrong, but even if they do, they don't stand their ground.

A permissive parent doesn't impose punishments or consequences. They don't take any actions to keep the child from skipping again or even show it if they think it's important. A permissive parent tends to want their child to like them, so they don't push.

Consequences of permissive parenting

When a mostly permissive parent raises a child, they don't learn to set their limits. They might act impulsively and show little self-control. At the same time, they may seek to control others. They're typically aimless and don't usually focus on achievement. They're often rebellious.

Uninvolved or neglectful parenting style

People with an uninvolved style of parenting don't respond to their child's needs. They don't make themselves available when their child needs them. They may even seem to reject their child. An uninvolved style of parenting is similar to being neglectful.

If the school sends home information about activities, the uninvolved parent probably won't even look at the sheet. They don't ask the child if they want to do an activity or pay enough attention to notice the child's need to do it.

If the child decides to do the activity, the parent doesn't make sure they have the supplies they need or transportation to get home. Either the child can't keep up, or someone else steps in to provide these things. If someone does take on those parental responsibilities, the child might bond to them and view them as a role model, whether that's a good idea or not.

If the child of an uninvolved parent skips school, the parent typically won't respond at all. The only exception would be if the child's actions had consequences for the parent.

Consequences of uninvolved parenting 

When children have received mostly  neglectful parenting , they tend to think there's something wrong with them. Their self-esteem is low, and they have little self-confidence.

Disciplinarian or authoritarian parenting style

A parent acting in the authoritarian style is a strict disciplinarian. They rarely explain why they make the rules they make, but they expect the child to follow their rules explicitly. They expect their child to do what they want and to do it perfectly. When the child doesn't manage to satisfy them, they punish them.

When the child brings home their list of activities to choose from, the authoritarian parent tells them which one they must do. They don't listen to find out what the child wants. They also set rules about attendance and participation in the activity. They expect the child to excel in the activity, even though they don't nurture them with understanding or support.

If the teenager of an authoritarian parent skips school, the parent immediately goes straight to punishment. They might lecture them about it. Even if they ask them why they skipped, they probably don't want to know. They don't listen or negotiate, regardless of what the teen's reason might be. They aren't interested.

Consequences of authoritarian parenting

Children raised by authoritarian parents tend to be fearful. They usually have low self-esteem. They may be shy and have poor social skills. If the child wants to show someone they love them, their go-to response is obedience. When they're away from the authoritarian parent, they risk them misbehaving in rebellion or never truly expressing themselves.

Using a combined parenting style

As mentioned earlier here, most parents use a combination of styles. This can be helpful to deal with different situations in ways that are appropriate.

For example, if a child could do an afterschool activity, they'll probably have the best outcome if their parent uses an authoritative parenting style, allowing them to have input before the parent makes the final decision. However, in the second scenario, the parent might do the most good for their child by using an authoritarian approach, but with better communication.

Although it can be healthy to use different parenting styles, you must make sure your child knows what to expect from you as much as possible. They need consistent rules and consequences. They also need to be nurtured and supported. It's even okay to indulge your child on rare occasions.

While being a 'helicopter parent' may be harmful, there is little place for uninvolved parenting styles in healthy parenting. Instead, it's best to allow independence when possible, without abandoning or neglecting your child.

What to do if you're concerned about your parenting style

What type of parenting style do you usually use? If you aren't sure, think about how you communicate with and correct your child. You might feel that you could do a better job if you understood parenting better. You might even be worried about what could happen if you continue along on your present course.

Changing to a healthier parenting style might be very helpful for your child and your relationship with them. Making that change is rarely easy. Talking to a therapist can help you learn parenting skills like communication, negotiation, and self-control. When you talk to a licensed counselor at Regain for online therapy, they can help you identify your unique parenting style and refine it to give the child what they need when they need it. You might have been on the wrong track before, but with help, you can parent your child to be a strong, independent, and caring adult.

Understanding parenting style: Frequently asked questions (FAQs)

What are the 4 types of parenting styles.

The four types of parenting styles are:

Authoritarian parenting 

Uninvolved parenting , permissive parenting , authoritative parenting .

Authoritarian parenting, also called disciplinarian style, is a type of parenting that involves setting many rules and demanding perfect adherence to them. The goal is for the parent to be in complete control of their child's behavior (this is a similarity to helicopter parents). With authoritarian parenting, when a child misbehaves, they're punished, and the punishments are often severe. The child is not allowed to question their parents' decisions or make many of their own decision. The parents rule, and the children obey, or they face the consequence that their parents set. Parenting practices of authoritarian parents can often be harsh and feel cold and unloving to the child. 

The uninvolved parenting style, also called neglectful parenting, refers to a parenting style that allows the child to do whatever they want without interference from their parents. They have no one to teach them the best ways to do things, and they often end up being physically hurt because there's no one watching out for them. Their parents don't take care of their needs or teach them what they need to survive when they grow up. The goal of an uninvolved parent is not to be bothered by their children.

The permissive parenting style is similar to uninvolved parenting only because it allows the child to do anything they like. However, in terms of the goal of parenting, the permissive style is different. The permissive parent wants their child to like them, and their parenting reflects that. They set no expectations or limits on their child's behavior at all. In terms of attitude in parenting, permissive parents are happy to do whatever it takes for their child to get what they want at the moment.

Consider all the parenting styles: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved. Of these, authoritative parents tend to be the most rational. Authoritative parents are the authorities, or experts, on life, but they are not the absolute rulers like authoritarians. Authoritative parents allow their children to have a genuine say, but in the end, they make decisions based on what benefits their child and their family most, both in the short run and in the long-term. Being an authoritative parent means addressing your child's needs and having positive expectations of them. Yet, at the same time, an authoritative parent does set limits. Authoritative parents have rational discussions with their child about the child's goals and needs, listening and explaining so that everyone is on the same page. Read here for more authoritative parenting examples.

Although many experts have described these four parenting styles, another parenting style has been developed in recent years. It's called free-range parenting. Free-range parenting means giving your child freedom to explore their neighborhood, try new things, and have new experiences on their own. The parent's role is to prepare them for these experiences by teaching them the skills they need. Rather than overloading them with tons of structured activities, free-range parents allow their children lots of time for unstructured play. They encourage them to be independent and play outdoors as much as possible. They may have some rules, especially for safety issues, but their main goal is to allow their kids to be kids while developing the skills they need for later life. However, as mentioned above, strong evidence indicates that authoritative parents tend to raise the healthiest, most capable children. 

What is the most effective parenting style?

The link between parenting styles and outcomes for children is undeniable. And each parenting style might be appropriate in specific cases. Yet, of all the parenting styles, authoritative parents seem to get the best results.

In most instances, authoritative parenting is the most effective of all the types of parenting styles. Because their parents listen to them and explain what they need to know about their rules and decisions, the children feel understood and valued. They are more likely to follow the rules and pursue the set goals when they understand them. This is especially true if they had a voice in making those rules or setting those goals. Children learn from their parents how the world works and what they need to do to thrive. They tend to have positive attitudes, rational ways of thinking, and good social skills.

The permissive style of parenting has many drawbacks. The children are in control even though they aren't mature enough to know what's best for them. No one questions their poor decisions or expects them to do anything they aren't eager to do. This sets them up for disappointment and failure later in life. They don't have the skills they need to thrive unless they just happened to want to learn them. When they can't get what they want, the children of permissive parents don't know what to do about it. So, they act out in anger, quit trying, or get into bad habits.

The link between parenting and outcomes couldn't be more evident than with neglectful, uninvolved parenting. The children of uninvolved parents typically have very low self-esteem. After all, their parents showed no signs that they cared anything about them. Because an uninvolved parent's parenting practices are so lacking, the children grow up without any guidance or instruction in life. Thus, they may find it hard to build a life for themselves when they grow up.

As for the authoritarian parenting style, understanding what can happen if you stick to this style alone is critical. The influence of parenting like your child's ruler can show up later when they rebel against society or adopt extreme conformity. They tend to be filled with fear and anxiety and have low self-worth. With the authoritative parents around, the child might be quick to obey, but as soon as they are away from their parents, they tend to do the opposite of what their parents want.

How do I fix bad parenting?

The best way to fix bad parenting is to talk to a therapist about it. Maybe you were the victim of too much of the least helpful parenting styles—authoritarian, neglectful, or indulgent. Or maybe you've used these parenting styles too often, and now your children are behaving in unhealthy ways. Perhaps you would like to be a better parent and do what's most helpful for your children and your family. Maybe you learned about parenting through cultural influences like TV and movies, but now you want to learn more about the best parenting styles from an expert. In any of these cases, a therapist can help you heal the damage from bad parenting and set you on a better path for yourself and your children. Be on the lookout for bad parenting examples such as physical, emotional, and sexual abuse.

So, what can you do to help yourself? First, you can look at your parenting practices and determine what types of parenting styles you've been using. Next, try learning more about authoritative parenting. Put the parenting practices of an authoritative parent to work with your children. You can still use other styles at times if they are more appropriate to the situation. However, remember the relationships between parenting styles and children's behavior. Vary parenting styles as needed but avoid constantly switching from one style to another. Your child needs to know what to expect from you as much as possible.

Your children may need therapy as well, especially if your bad parenting has put them in danger or failed to meet their needs. If you've been a harsh disciplinarian, your child may need some therapy for their anxiety. And if you went through childhood with a bad parent, a therapist can help you understand what happened to you better and guide you as you learn to be a good parent for yourself and your children. If you have survived authoritarian, indulgent, or neglectful parents yourself, it's important to heal from your childhood. 

Can a parent yelling at a child be harmful?

Yes.  As a parent, yelling at your child can have severe consequences. Yelling is verbal abuse, and it can:

Affect the development of a child’s brain

Cause a child to become depressed

Cause medical conditions related to stress

Lead to chronic pain

Increase a child’s bad behavior

Raising children can be frustrating for anyone. That's why even the best parents may want to yell at their kids once in a while. But giving in to that impulse can be harmful to your child, no matter what parenting style you usually use. So, unless the yelling is to warn them of immediate danger, it's best to put a check on those parenting practices and find another way to communicate your message.

Why is authoritative parenting best?

Authoritative parenting has many advantages and benefits. Here are a few benefits that authoritative parents offer:

Children feel loved and valued and learn to value themselves as well

Children tend to behave appropriately

Children have a more positive attitude

Children become good at setting goals and working towards success

Family conflicts tend to be resolved without resorting to verbal or physical abuse

Children have limits as well as opportunities

In the long-term, children of authoritative parents tend to be more successful and happier

What are the 3 basic parenting styles? What is the hardest stage of parenting? What are the hardest parts of parenting? What is unhealthy parenting? What is emotionally abusive parenting?

Parenting styles: Related articles

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https://www.regain.us/advice/parenting/the-best-parenting-style-for-you-and-your-kids/

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Uninvolved Parenting

https://www.regain.us/advice/parenting/the-dangers-of-indulgent-parenting/

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• Does Helicopter Parenting Hurt Your Child’s Future?

Types of Parenting Styles and Their Impact on Children

Parenting is a challenging yet rewarding endeavor. But how do we decide how to raise our children? Many people who have kids, whether they parent alone or with a partner, have asked this question. It can be overwhelming when choosing types of parenting styles to follow, especially since these styles can vary from person to person. Here, we’ll walk you through the different parenting styles identified by researchers over the years and their impact on children.

Authoritative Parenting Style

This parenting style is all about being responsive, nurturing, and supportive while setting firm limits for children [ * ]. Let’s look at the details of this parenting style.

Characteristics

The authoritative parenting style is characterized by a balance between independence and structure. It allows children to grow within reasonable boundaries while still exploring their abilities and desires. While parents who use this style implement strict standards that they expect their children to abide by, they also provide support by fostering an emotionally caring environment that builds trust.

This style of parenting is sometimes called “tough but fair.” Children have the space to make mistakes without fear of judgment while still having a structure that provides guidance. Other characteristics of authoritative parenting include supportive rather than punitive disciplinary measures and being assertive but not intrusive and restrictive.

Impact on children

Children raised using an authoritative parenting style are usually confident, happy, and successful. They are more likely to make good decisions and evaluate risks better on their own. Authoritative parenting is connected to academic achievement, heightened self-esteem, and resilience [ * ].

Children with authoritative parents tend to have the following:

• Positive and nurturing relationship with parents
• Tendency to be respectful and responsible
• High sense of self-esteem, confidence, and self-regulation
• A higher likelihood of being happy and successful
• Better ability to manage their aggression
• Better ability to clearly express their emotions

Children who are raised with this style of parenting can be trusted to make the right decisions on their own. These kids also tend to set high expectations for themselves. They tend to perform well academically and socially, and they are less likely to abuse drugs or alcohol. This may be helpful for parenting children with different needs, such as the highly sensitive child .

Example of an authoritative parenting style

There are many examples where authoritative parenting styles can be seen. One situation where it clearly shows is during mealtimes.

Rather than imposing strict restrictions and rules, authoritative parents model eating behaviors. They will typically include kids during meal preparation and involve them in the decision-making, such as choosing what to have for dinner one night a week. Research shows that authoritative parenting leads to better outcomes in weight management and eating habits in children [ * ].

Related Article:   Mindful Parenting: Benefits, Tips, and Examples

Authoritarian Parenting Style

Authoritarian parents are much more rigid than authoritative parents and implement tough rules for their children to follow. Learn more about this type of parenting below.

Authoritarian parenting styles are characterized by the strict enforcement of rules that children are expected to follow without question. These rules are not open for interpretation, compromise, or further discussion. This parenting style is also known for using punishments when rules are violated to ensure obedience from children. Affection is not usually expressed, if at all.

This approach to parenting can have negative consequences on children that can follow them into adulthood. Children who were raised by authoritarian parents often have trouble with the following:

• Making decisions for themselves
• Choosing right from wrong independently
• Self-esteem issues
• Needing confirmation of their worth from outside authority figures

Authoritarian parenting does not seem to instill lasting lessons. Children will often act out in their parents' absence and seek guidance from someone else, both of which are signs that your child does not respect you .

Example of an authoritarian parenting style

Let us use the same example of mealtimes to illustrate the authoritarian parenting style.

Unlike authoritative parents who involve their children in the decision-making and preparation of meals for the family, authoritarian parents are more likely to enforce strict rules. They may require everyone to eat simultaneously and enforce punishments for not finishing on their plate. The family is less likely to discuss why they eat certain foods and how they contribute to culture, health, and well-being.

Permissive Parenting Style

Permissive parenting styles don’t implement rules or structures that may upset their children. Here are the characteristics of this type of parenting.

The permissive parenting style is considered the opposite of the authoritarian parenting style. It is characterized by the non-implementation of rules or structures that may go against what the child wants. Parents who use this style usually give their children what they want. They also often act as peers or friends to their kids.

While being extra responsive to your child’s needs can be beneficial, the lack of structure can have negative consequences. Parents who practice a permissive parenting style may end up with entitled or anxious children who develop those traits because no one is taking charge.

Since children have high authority and standing in the household, children of permissive parents are used to getting what they want. This can lead to behavioral problems as they are not used to authority and rules.

Some downsides of permissive parenting include the following:

• Difficulty making decisions
• Lack of responsibility
• Lack of independence
• Struggling academically

Children who undergo this style of parenting may become egotistical, selfish, and entitled. They may also refuse or fail to put any effort into school, work, and social endeavors since they are not expected to do so at home. If your child is constantly angry as a result of this type of parenting, you may need to use certain rules to parent an angry child .

Permissive parents may also raise children with a greater risk of developing health problems, such as a high BMI and obesity, as they struggle to limit unhealthy food intake or promote regular exercise [ * ]. Children are also more likely to develop cavities since permissive parents do not enforce good habits such as tooth brushing.

Example of a permissive parenting style

Let us use the same example of mealtimes mentioned above to illustrate permissive parenting. In this parenting style, parents are lax about the foods their children have, allowing them to choose whatever they want. Parents will even go out of their way to provide what their children desire.

This may lead to picky eating and unhealthy dietary choices. Not only is permissive parenting associated with a lower intake of fruits and vegetables, but it may also result in children experiencing difficulty being flexible with food options in social settings.

Uninvolved Parenting Style

Also known as the neglectful parenting style, uninvolved parents often ignore their children and offer little guidance, nurturing, and attention. Read on to learn more about this parenting style.

Parents who practice the uninvolved or neglectful parenting style do not interact much with their children. This parenting style is characterized by the non-implementation of any structure or rules. These parents also do not show much affection to their children or get involved with their kids’ lives. Children are mostly left to fend for themselves.

This parenting style can negatively impact children, especially when taken to the extreme. Even if it is not physically damaging, the emotional and psychological consequences of this parenting style can be severe. It can lead to children:

• Having difficulty forming close relationships
• Becoming depressed
• Lashing out by taking part in delinquent or hostile behavior
• Having failed relationships
• Cutting themselves off from others

Neglectful parents may also raise children who develop attachment issues. This is a result of a fleeting or absent parent-child bond or relationship.

Example of an uninvolved parenting style

Uninvolved parents are very inconsistent when it comes to mealtimes at home. They might not plan meals or even buy groceries at all, leaving children to fend for themselves. As a result, children may become preoccupied with food and often eat too much when food does become available, leading to obesity.

Frequently Asked Questions

Here are some commonly asked questions regarding styles of parenting.

What is the most common parenting style?

While most parents adopt mixed parenting styles, the authoritative parenting style is most common [ * ].

What type of parenting style is most recommended?

The most recommended parenting style is the authoritative parenting style. Clear communication, structure and support, and age-appropriate standards allow for the development of emotionally stable adults who can navigate life more successfully.

What role does culture play in parenting styles?

Culture plays a significant role in shaping parenting styles by influencing parents' values, beliefs, and goals for their children.

Individualistic cultures may favor authoritative or permissive styles, while collectivistic cultures may emphasize authoritarian approaches. Values like respect for elders, gender roles, and academic achievement can shape discipline, expectations, and child-rearing practices [ * ].

Are there any other types of parenting styles?

There are many other parenting style subtypes, including helicopter parenting, free-range parenting, snowplow parenting, lighthouse parenting, attachment parenting, parallel parenting, and tiger parenting.

The Bottom Line

There's no perfect parenting style, but by understanding the different approaches and their potential effects, you can find a balance that works for your family. Your child's needs will change over time, so be flexible and adjust your approach as they grow. The most important thing is to create a loving and supportive environment that fosters your child's unique potential.

If you need tips on parenting an anxious child or want to learn how to support children with specific needs, then do not hesitate to contact a qualified professional.

References:

• American Psychological Association. Parenting Styles. 2017.
• Hayek J, Schneider F, Lahoud N, et al. Authoritative parenting stimulates academic achievement, also partly via self-efficacy and intention towards getting good grades. 30 March 2022.
• Lopez N, Schembre S, Belcher B, et al. Parenting styles, food-related parenting practices, and children’s healthy eating: A mediation analysis to examine relationships between parenting and child diet. 18 June 2018.
• Hayek J, Tueni M, F Schneider, et al. Parenting style as longitudinal predictor of adolescents’ health behaviors in Lebanon. 16 December 2020.
• Rangarajan J, Narasimhan U, Janakiraman A, et al. Parenting Styles of Parents Who Had Children With and Without High Risk at Birth: A Cross-sectional Comparative Study. 23 February 2020.
• Masamba H. Cultural Influences on Parenting Styles and Child Development. 2024.

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